always...

chapter 42 - oikawa

oikawa picked up his phone to check the time as he sat on the couch in his living room.

12:14pm.

iwaizumi was coming over at 1 to hang out with him for the first time in weeks, but each second that oikawa waited for him felt like an hour.

oikawa groaned in frustration, throwing his phone across the room so he wouldn't have to watch the minutes tick by. with an exasperated sigh, oikawa got up from the couch and headed to the kitchen after deciding to bake, yet again, to pass the time.

he took out all the ingredients and supplies he needed from his cabinet along with his favorite teal colored apron. he measured out flour, sugar, baking powder, salt, butter, and vanilla. then, he cracked 2 eggs into the bowl and added in the other ingredients accordingly.

in no time, oikawa had finished the batter and poured it into a square pan. finally, he slid the pan into the oven and set a timer for 25 minutes.

suddenly, the doorbell rang, causing oikawa to jump before he rushed to answer the door.

"iwa-chan! you're here! is it really 1 already?" oikawa asked, confused.

"hi tōru. yes, it's 1 already. you probably got caught up baking again," iwaizumi answered, noticing his apron.

"yeah, probably," oikawa shrugged, turning back towards the kitchen with iwaizumi following close behind.

"what'd you make this time? actually, wait. let me guess..." iwaizumi stopped and sniffed the air for a moment.

"if you don't guess right, then we are no longer friends," oikawa retorted.

"hmm...chocolate chip-no wait...blondies," he sniffed again. "yep. definitely blondies," iwaizumi decided.

"congratulations, we're still friends!" oikawa exclaimed, rolling his eyes.

"aw c'mon! have some faith in me, shittykawa. i've known you for 11 years and i know all of your recipes."

oikawa only hummed in response before starting a new conversation. the boys caught up after not hanging out for weeks while the blondies baked in the oven, the sweet, caramel-like scent wafting through the kitchen.

once they were done, oikawa took them out and let them cool on a wire rack while iwaizumi set up oikawa's xbox in the living room.

"tōru! portal or animal crossing?" iwaizumi yelled across the room.

"i played animal crossing earlier, so portal!" the setter responded.

iwaizumi set up the game, making sure that the 2 controllers both had batteries in them, when oikawa finally entered the room with a plate full of the freshly baked treats.

oikawa sat down next to iwaizumi, taking a controller from his outstretched hand. they had played this game several times before, having been able to pass almost every level with ease because they always worked so well together.

both, on the court and off, oikawa and iwaizumi shared a certain connection, an understanding of the other's way of thinking which gave them the upper hand whenever they were on the same team for anything.

within mere hours, they beat the game for the 7th time ever and decided to just rewatch old recordings of volleyball matches.

iwaizumi seemed so relaxed around oikawa today, while the latter was anxiously bouncing his leg, eager to ask a certain question.

he knew he'd regret asking if he did, but he couldn't stop himself. while iwaizumi was commenting on a point that had just been scored, oikawa suddenly interrupted him.

"so how's kaede?" oikawa asked quickly, immediately cringing at his decision.

brace yourself for the drama.

"oh um...i didn't think you'd want to know, but honestly...things are really good," iwaizumi smiled softly.

"wait, really? you haven't had any problems with her yet?" oikawa questioned, slightly shocked.

"nope."

"huh...that's new."

"i actually really like her tōru. she's...different from the others. i feel like we have an actual emotional connection and i really enjoy spending time with her," iwaizumi gushed.

"oh...um...good for you, i guess," oikawa mumbled, feeling a sudden pang in his chest.

"c'mon, i thought you'd be happier for me! you're always telling me to stop settling for girls that aren't worth my time. kaede is worth it all, i'm sure of it."

"mhm...i am happy, hajime. after all your failed past relationships, i'm just a little surprised is all," oikawa insisted.

"are you sure?" iwaizumi asked, a hint of concern tainting his voice.

oikawa hummed, trying to plaster on the best smile he could before turning back to the tv.

"well...what about you tōru? is there anyone you're interested in?"

the setter froze, unsure of how to respond.

shit shit shit...what do i say? "actually iwa, i've been in love with you for 3 fucking years, but all this time you've been too blind to notice me" ? i can't fucking confess now...that'll just look like i'm trying to guilt trip him and sabotage his relationship...he finally seems happy too...

"oh um...no one actually," oikawa muttered.

"pffttt, lies," iwaizumi declared.

"what? no! i don't like anyone, okay?" oikawa defended.

"tōru, i know how to tell when you're lying. your nose always scrunches up and you pick at your nails while you mutter some dumb excuse," iwaizumi gestured towards oikawa's hands.

he hadn't even noticed, but he was picking at his nails, digging at the flour that had gotten stuck underneath them from earlier.

"i'm not lying!" oikawa pouted, pulling his hands away from each other and sitting on them. "i don't like anyone!"

"just tell me! don't tell me you don't trust me all of a sudden...ooh! is it suga maybe??" iwaizumi guessed with a mischievous gleam in his eye.

"no, hajime. i'm not interested in him like that."

"well, who is it then? who do you like??" iwaizumi pressed on.

"i-i..." oikawa stuttered, his cheeks reddening with heat.

just confess to him already!

"well?? spit it out!"

"i-...no one!! okay? i don't like anyone, so just...just drop it, hajime."

iwaizumi was stunned by oikawa's tone which carried a certain intense finality to it.

"okay...i'm sorry," the ace apologized, looking down at the floor.

"let's just keep watching the recordings, alright?" oikawa suggested.

iwaizumi silently agreed, the air around them still tense.

there goes your chance, you idiot.