always...

chapter 41 - daichi & suga

the alarm on suga's phone went off, jolting the gray haired teen awake. summer break was over and it was time to go back to school...which also meant volleyball.

but both meant that he'd have to see daichi again no matter what.

suga groaned, stretching in his bed before reaching over to shut off his ever-persistent alarm.

the 3 weeks off gave suga some time to think and process, though he was still left confused and conflicted.

during those 3 weeks, suga had decided to start journaling at the recommendation of asahi to which suga reluctantly agreed to. asahi had assured him that it would be a good way to help sort his thoughts, however suga still had his doubts.

he still remembered his entry from last night, thinking back on what he wrote as he got dressed for the day.

august 27, 1:29am

i'm okay.

i'm not good...but i'm not bad either. so, i'm okay...i think. i've been clean for about 3 weeks now, so that's something.

i miss daichi. i know he doesn't love me anymore, yet somehow i still love him...? but he's changed so much. maybe i'm still in love with the person he used to be...when we were both happy.

god, i miss being happy. loving someone and being loved back. how did it all turn to shit so quickly? i have no idea.

suga shook his head, still wondering how journaling was ever going to help him.

the setter went downstairs and ate breakfast with his parents, remaining relatively silent except for the occasional small talk.

soon, suga was out the door headed towards the school. it wasn't long before he arrived just in time to find kageyama and hinata out of breath, yet again, from racing to the gym door.

from what suga could gather, it seems hinata had won since kageyama was now pouting and ignoring the smaller ginger.

hinata chuckled and shoved kageyama's shoulder before grabbing the collar of the setter's practice jacket and pulling him down for a quick kiss on the cheek. kageyama blushed bright red before muttering a spew of insults back at hinata.

suga smiled, happy to see the two had finally gotten together yet still kept up with their usual antics.

the vice captain unlocked the gym doors and soon, the rest of the team slowly trickled in. soft chatter filled the room as everyone caught up with each other and told stories of how they spent their summer vacation.

the last one in the gym was daichi, but to everyone's surprise, michimiya wasn't clinging to his side as usual.

today, daichi walked in alone.

did they break up? what happened? is he okay? shit...stop worrying about him. it's none of your business anymore, stop caring about him.

daichi was sluggish for the entirety of practice, to which he got an earful from ukai. his eyes were bloodshot and he kept rubbing his temples every 10 minutes.

karasuno's usual lively and supportive captain had suddenly gone quiet and cold.

meanwhile, suga couldn't help but worry. deep down, he knew he still had a soft spot for his ex, and no matter how hard he tried to hate daichi for how much he broke him, he just couldn't.

from the moment daichi walked into the gym, suga could tell something was off and it bothered him all day.

regardless, he knew it wasn't his place to ask about it and so he kept to himself, letting his worry eat him up inside yet again.