Chapter 32: Going Past the Veil

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I stand before a close wooden door, feeling cold and numb. Slowly I grasp the handle and push the door open, musty and stale air greeting me as I walk into His study.

Everything was left in a state of disarray; file cabinets left open, random files scattered on the variety of surfaces. I go in further, step by step, past the bookshelves full of books, the hanging paintings, the framed poems and then I'm at his desk. Stacks of paper pushed to one side, a pot on it's side spilling out the pens it had once hold, in the centre are test papers that remain unmarked - students names scrawled up in the corner. 

All the signs He left in a hurry. 

But why? 

Was He so eager to be with his mistress? 

I push the chair to the side, letting it spin away as I look through his desk - pushing away the papers, the stationary, opening up the cupboards, pulling out the many notebooks that are kept. I leaf through their pages, scanning over their handwritten contents, waiting for something to jump out at me. But there's nothing. 

I put them aside and upon confirming that nothing else in his desk held anything of importance to my goal I turn on his computer, going through his documents there. There's still nothing. Just future tests for his students, lesson plans, some of the essays that he managed to get published. I go through his email, trying to see if he sent anything that mentions family but nothing turns up. Not even emails that would indicate an affair with one of his contacts. 

Shutting the compute down I turn back around eyeing the many books and files here. 

There has to be something here. There must be. 

I start pulling books off of shelves, going through their pages, looking out for his handwriting all in hopes of something jumping out at me, something that can tell me about his past. But the best I can find is his birth certificate 

There's not even baby photos hanging around. 

"Kayla I'm home!" 

There's the closing of the door, the rustling of bags, the sound of movement. 

"I got some takeaway for dinner!" 

Clicking of heels across the floor. 

"Kayla?" 

There's more movement, the pushing open of doors. 

"Oh there you are! What are you doing here?" 

I look up from the papers in my hand, sitting cross-legged on the ground, my mother stands in the doorway in her business clothes. 

"Hi mum. Sorry, I lost something and I thought I left it here." 

"I can see that..." She says, eyeing the mess of the study. "Come on, let's watch something and have dinner, ok?" She goes to leave. 

"Mum, why did Dad never talk about his family?" 

She stops and there's a beat of before she turns to look back at me. Her shoulders slightly tensed, a flicker of emotion in her eyes. 

"Sweetie?" 

"Dad never talked about his family or where he came from. He didn't talk about what it was like growing up or if he had any brothers and sisters or anything like that. 

She walks into the study and grabs the chair that had wheeled near to where I am. She sits down. 

"Ok. Well what do you already know?" 

"I know he's Japanese-American. That's it." 

"Come on sweetie, you know more than that. Try harder. You've lived with him, what do you know from his habits? From your observations?" 

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