Before Me, Him

Chapter 11

     As we arrive at "The Plaza" to have our meal we end up talking a bit more.

     - Robert, I'm sorry if this sounds rude but, are you not lonely?

     - Well... That's an interesting question, my dear. Without my daughter and wife here it gets a little bit lonely sometimes but I do have my other family. – Robert smiles kindly. – They always manage to cheer me up!

     - Your other family?

     - My animals. Gloria, Dwarf, Don, Pup... All those beautiful animals. They are very sensitive you know? They know when I'm down so they always come to cheer me up. – Robert's expression was one of a happy man. – One time Dwarf, one of my goats, felt it and he came to meet me in the kitchen. He started rubbing his head on my legs and then took me outside. Then all of them approached me and started talking to me!

     I didn't know how to reply. "He must feel so lonely that now he is delusional" was the first thought on my mind. I never had animals so I never understood that type of connection. When the school's pet died, Jerry, a beautiful white bunny, I was just worried that I would get home late because my classmates were making a fuss filled with tears of sadness. 

     I don't think Robert is a delusional man, at all so maybe there might be reasoning behind his words. Whether he was crazy or not I wanted to be with him in order to give him a small amount of happiness. But was that really the true reason behind my "kindness"? I think that in a way I was also using Robert as a scapegoat to my own problem: Jacob. If I could be in a place where he couldn't find me and if I can avoid him because "I have plans" then it is the perfect plan.

     It would be easier to tell him I don't want to see him or even explain to Emily the whole situation but I don't know how to do that anymore. I've kept my feelings bottled up for so long that I don't know what it is to trust people anymore, to count on them, and to be able to tell them how I really feel inside. I could lie. That would be the easiest solution but... I hate lies. I'd rather avoid that option at all costs.

     - Robert... This may sound like I'm intruding in your personal life but... - I ask with a glimpse of insecurity. – Would you mind if I went to your farm from time to time? I would love to chat more with you and help you with your animals and other chores!

     - Of course, stop by anytime! – he says after a couple of seconds of silence.

     Two hours later, as we finish eating we trade numbers: I give him my phone number and he gives me his house phone number. Robert waves his hand while he slowly walks towards a bus station to return to his house. "What should I do now?" I ask my own buttons.

     I didn't want to go meet them yet so I thought about roaming around for a while. It would help me digest the food faster and decrease the amount of time I would be together with all of them. As I walked by I saw a small road sign stating: "Vella Library". I remember what Philip had told me about the library here, it was a small place but, even then, I was curious to see how it was so I ended up following the road until I reached it.

   The library was, indeed very small, at least compared to Hollum's library. Vella's only had two floors, each one with five rows of shelves of books and three tables. On the first floor, there also was a reception area with a beautiful lady in her mid-thirties focused on her big book.

     - Welcome! – she says with a wonderful and welcoming smile. I return it. – It's your first time here, isn't it?

     Her eyes were dark brown reminding me of a delicious chocolate mousse and her painted red hair was as bright as blood. Her lips were tainted with a warm red, just like an apple. - Yes, I'm here on vacation.

     - Wonderful! I hope you have a great time here! If you need anything just let me know. – she says before diving back into the, most likely, three-hundred-page book.

     As I looked to the shelves I could see the sunlight entering through the windows of the building reflecting the small pieces of dust floating in the air making it look like fairy powder. It was a comfortable place, small but welcoming. The shelves were divided by thematic so, in one shelve you only had Suspense type of books, on the other shelves Educational books, and so on. They were all ordered from A to Z. All these details showed how much this library was cared for.

     I go to the upper floor to see the Suspense section and, while looking around I find an interesting book called "Perfume". The story about a killer that aimed to get the most perfect perfume of all through human body conservation. I've heard about this book but I never had the chance to read it so I thought, "Why not borrow it for the month?". The moment that thought crossed my mind I heard the library's door opening.

     - Welcome! – says the red-haired lady while removing her attention from her book. – Oh, Philip! You're back already?

     I immediately hide behind one of the shelves. What was Philip doing here? He was supposed to be with Emily and the others. Unless... I peek my head out of the shelf and look out the window. There they were. The whole gang united again.

     - I just finished this one so I was thinking of renting another book. Did you receive any new ones? He came here to get a new book, at the precise moment I was also here. I seriously have the worst timing possible. I was thinking of a way out where they wouldn't be able to see me but it was no use, for all I know, the library only has the front door entrance. There is no other hidden door I can use.

     - We got a couple of books that came in this morning so feel free to look around!

     - Thank you!

     I can just wait here, hidden. But what if he comes to these shelves area? He'll see me. Maybe I can go down the stairs right after he comes up and then I hide in one of the bottom's floor shelves until he goes away. That is my safest bet.

      I start hearing Philip's footsteps on the stairway and I wait a couple of seconds until I hear him scrambling on some books. I could hear some books being placed in and out of the shelves, so I assumed that was my chance. I walked swiftly and silently to the stairs but as I touch the top step I hear him.

     - June?

     I didn't want to reply, I wanted to ignore his presence and leave this area as fast as possible but I couldn't do that. I turn around and face him.