ATLA highschool AU

I'm Not Letting You Go

Katara's POV

Azula was there, and god did I need her, I needed to talk to someone who wasn't a close friend, a relative, or my boyfriend, now I just need to spend some alone time to listen to these thoughts in my head, to figure out what I should do next. I walked into my room, and there was Aang.

He was sat on the bed, he jumped as I opened the door and looked at me with wide eyes, standing up with a look of hope on his face, he wanted me to talk, I guess I'll have to.

"How was the walk back?", he smiled rubbing the back of his neck, finding this conversation just as awkward as I am.

"Good", I stayed where I was, standing in the door way and held onto my arm, I'm not ready to have this conversation with him, I feel guilty enough as it is.

"Katara, can we sit for a second?", he asked and pointed at the bed keeping his soft smile, I nodded and took a deep breath, closing the door and sitting down, he sat down with me. "How long have you known?", he asked.

"Not too long", I shrugged, trying my best to keep eye contact but feeling guilt eat me up every single time I just look at him. "I haven't had any check ups or anything, I've been busy and I wanted to forget".

"And you couldn't tell me? Why?", he seemed to get angry, why wouldn't he be furious that I hid this away from him.

"I'm scared, I didn't want you to know, because I knew you wouldn't be scared, you'd be happy, and I'm the opposite, I have to deal with this all over again", I felt my chest tighten, it's a horrible feeling to say this to him.

"Of course I would be happy, you should be too, we have the opportunity to bring another adorable baby into the world, a life, family Katara, surely what you go through is worth it right?", he doesn't know at all how it feels to carry a life and throw away your own.

I didn't want to argue, I didn't want any of this, so I kept quiet and tried not to react to anything he's saying. But he wanted me to respond, and began to get impatient.

"Katara? You do want it deep down I know you do", he frowned, he's begging me to keep it, I shook my head and turned to sit on the edge of the bed, ready to leave this conversation, but he moved around me quickly, sitting behind me and wrapping his arms around me so I couldn't move.

"Aang, please let me go", I sighed turning my head to the side so I could look back at him. "This hurts me as much as it hurts you, but it hurts me even more when you make me feel so rotten about it", I looked back ahead and closed my eyes so I wouldn't cry.

"I'm sorry but I have to, I don't want you to regret this decision and feel bad about it your whole life, we've done this once we can do it again", Aang was so positive about all of this, how can he not see the negatives?

"Last time was terrible, I can't say it was a good experience over all, you hid my pregnancy, I was given alcohol, you left me to deal with it on my own-", I began listing the negatives of my last pregnancy but Aang interrupted.

"But I came back", he held me closer to him when all I wanted to do was get away. "I came back and I was immature I know, and I have no idea what it's like to give birth or have something growing inside you which sounds really gross, but I know we love our little boy, you can't tell me he wasn't worth it".

"He's worth everything", I sighed with a sad smile on my face, "but Bumi is already here, that's all in the past now, I'm ready to live, not this", I shook my head.

"Can I?", Aang moved one of his hands across my sides, he wanted to hold my stomach like he would if a bump was there, he was going to start feeling connected to it, I couldn't let him.

"Don't.", I moved his hand off me and got out of his arms, "Aang please", I looked down at him with tears in my eyes.

"Okay", he sighed then stood up slowly and held his arms out, "c'mon", he beckoned me to come over, with all this fighting and emotion, I haven't lost my love for him.

I nodded and walked into his arms, resting my head on his chest and wrapping my arms around him, it calmed me down, helped me think, the truth is he is really good at persuading, and I'm already telling myself that he's right. moved off him and took off what I was wearing, he seemed confused.

"I thought you said we weren't going to do it again?", he chuckled then noticed the sour expression on my face and realised that was the wrong thing to say, he watched me walk to the mirror and examine myself, he knew exactly what I was doing. "Can I now?", he stood behind me and looked at me in the mirror.

"Alright", I smiled lightly and watched him through the mirror, both of his hands moved around me and rested on my stomach, here comes this feeling again.

"Remember what I told you last time with Bumi?", he smiled at me in the mirror, resting his head on my shoulder and staying close, "you've got to say hello", he looked down at my stomach and said hello.

I kept my eyes on myself in the mirror whilst he talked, this feeling. The feeling of protectiveness, of responsibility, this mothering feeling, that's it.

It's taking over, I've fallen in love again.

I'm not letting you go.