i know i love you | hueningkaixreader

thirty five.

I felt the need to pinch myself upon seeing him sitting up in his bed.

"T-Taehyun? You're awake?"

"I hope so," he said weakly.

I couldn't help it. I threw my arms around him as tears streamed down my face. "You don't know how long I've been waiting for you to—"

"Shh." Taehyun wrapped an arm around me. "Don't cry, I'm okay!"

"No, I know you're okay." Taehyun moved over and I sat down next to him. "But I guess I'm just overwhelmed with emotion. Sorry..."

He chuckled. "Don't worry, your boyfriend is fully back!"

Boyfriend. The word took me by surprise. I realized that I hadn't referred to Taehyun as my boyfriend ever since Kai and I shared our first kiss. And hearing him say that word so proudly, not knowing anything that had happened between me and his best friend...

The guilt I was feeling was immeasurable.

"Taehyun... There's something I need to tell you," I began. The longer I waited, the more it would hurt for him. I had to tell him now.

"Y/N, the tone of your voice is scaring me," Taehyun muttered. "What happened? Did Beomgyu wreck the dorm while I was gone?"

I wanted to laugh, but I couldn't bring myself to. "No..." I didn't know where to begin. How was I supposed to tell him everything? "Oh, by the way, I think I might be in love with your best friend and also, we kissed twice already and I enjoyed it way more than I should've—"

"Y/N, everything okay?"

"I'm sorry, I just spaced out a little."

"I could tell." Taehyun brought a hand to the side of my face and started caressing my jawline with his thumb, exactly the way Kai did back at the stream this morning. My heart began to pound, but not because of Taehyun...

Because of Kai. The memory of him holding my face in his hand was so potent that I was reliving it now. And instead of seeing Taehyun, I was now imagining Kai. I was imagining his dark, deep-set eyes, soft lips, messy blonde hair...

Taehyun pulled me back to reality. "I think you spaced out again." He grinned. "I get it, you're shook that I'm actually talking to you right now, huh?"

I nodded because I couldn't find my words.

"Well, hopefully this helps." Before I could react, Taehyun's lips crashed onto mine. I should've felt butterflies in my stomach. My face should've burned up. But nothing happened. Even as I moved my lips in an attempt to feel something, there was nothing.

I pulled back, confused. But I tried to hide it with a smile. "That definitely helped," I lied.

"You're so adorable when you're flustered." Taehyun kept his hand on my face, now caressing my cheek. "Well don't worry, because I'm awake and I'm not going anywhere."