What if...? || Markhyuck

-66-

[june 2021]

[minhyung]

I didn't know if I was going to do the right thing or if I was making another blunder and a mistake in my life. But I knew one thing for sure - if I won't try, I would kick myself until the end of this miserable existence and waiting for Donghyuck's move would make me crazy. It had all taken too long. I've had enough. I was literally tired of his constant dodging doing anything to clarify misunderstandings. I understood that it might be difficult for him but it is also hard for me. We couldn't keep ourselves in it forever, we had to finally start to sort things out, because the approach to the problem that Donghyuck imposed on us both only intensified the conflict.

"Do you have a moment?" I asked Steven after coming to the basement. Donghyuck was running errands in the city, so I didn't have to worry about his watchful eye and ear. For the first time I decided to take matters into my own hands and it wasn't on my way to pay attention to own words and censor them.

"Sure, what's up?" he asked, turning chair towards me. On the laptop screen I saw really old vines with funny cats. Of course that nothing related to work.

"What do you know about the detachable folder from Hyuck's briefcase?" I asked without mincing words, trying to keep my tone neutral. Donghyuck didn't have full confidence in Steven, so I should be careful as well. Especially since I had no idea who to trust and who is involved in what. At times, I lost confidence even in myself, so I found it a disturbing sign and decided we should start clearing up some problematic issues before our lives fall apart again, as it used to.

"What folder?" man asked casually but too seriously for daily, not formal him.

"I don't know..." I muttered evasively. "Marco, giving me Hyuck's briefcase ages ago, took some thick folder out of it," I explained him, gesturing as if I was remembering the scene from the beginning.

"And you're interested in it now because...?" Steven smirked but was very alert. Years of working at his side gave me some knowledge of when a friendly conversation turns into a non-obvious, camouflaged interrogation.

"I've been cleaning up cartons from move recently and found Hyuck's briefcase from those great times when I thought it is possible to have this devil exclusively with it in the papers," I smirked and it was a sincere response. In hindsight, those were really wild times. "I looked through it with sentiment and remembered that Marco was taking something out of it and I just thought you know what, but if you don't it's fine," I shrugged as if didn't care. 

"I have no idea man but you can ask Donghyuck about it," Steven suggested, looking at me carefully. I really didn't like the look he was giving me. "Probably knows his memoir better than any papers, doesn't he?" he asked in a way that lit all alarm lights in my brain. I decided to turn this question into a joke. Steven was clearly a completely compromised informant. He must have had ass in the crack, in some shit himself. I preferred not to risk anything. Sometimes even seemingly wee matters could engage the individual in a dangerous game that puts life at stake.

"Mhm, sure," I nodded ironically. "I'll put briefcase under his nose and say: Look, honey, what a beautiful briefcase. What do you think is missing here? And then I'll be left without sex for a month for trying to remind him that I wanted to own him on paper. No thanks" I laughed as sat down in Donghyuck's chair. I didn't want to give the impression that I came here for one piece of information and now only an escape is the solution. I've lost my cover and it is irrational to go for an immediate retreat. You have to show the opponent that you feel comfortable in his personal space, that you don't feel threatened. Paradoxically, Donghyuck taught me that. The more I wondered about it, he gave me a lot of similar tips before. I never wondered where from he got such extensive knowledge on various topics - I just assimilated it. Admittedly, his advice usually concerned potential confrontations with Marco inquiring about our private life and relationships in the basement but the tactic itself seemed quite universal. "Too much loss than profit is with your fantastic advices, man," I added after a moment and Steven started laughing. He never took me seriously, so probably concluded that my sudden inquisitiveness was nothing serious as usual.