What if...? || Markhyuck

-x-

[1.5 year earlier]

[minhyung]

"You know I won't get out of here?" Luke asked after a very long silence that fell between us. It was a hard silence. I didn't even know why. It's just been like that for a long time now between us.

It was quiet.

"Why?" I asked, staring at the base of the upper bed. I drew the remains of pictures that were still in my head with fingers on the back of the brunet. I didn't want to oppose him in drawing issue but I didn't want to give it up completely as well. I always felt the need to grab a sheet of paper and a pencil after sex, which is why drawing with fingers on Luke's naked body was currently the only alternative allowed for me.

"Because I'm fucked up as hell, Markie," he said simply. "You're rather well," he finally admitted, although I have long ceased to feel like a properly functioning man.

"I don't want to leave, either," I whispered truthfully. I didn't want to learn to explore the world again. A world that hurt me. And I certainly didn't want to leave, to get to know it all by myself again.

"You don't decideon that," Luke sighed heavily, covering us both with disgustingly white sheets. It did get a bit chilly indeed.

"You'll see I am," I laughed, wanting to cheer him up somehow. "I won't leave you," I promised and I intended to keep that. I didn't know what exactly I would do but it is a center for mentally ill people. It was just enough to be mentally ill, right?

"You won't have a choice," he muttered under breath, staring blankly into space. "You must live normally."

"I don't want..." I started but Luke very quickly stopped my thought and entered the word.

"Promise me you'll meet a boy with a good heart and let him love you," he asked with tears in eyes.

"Luke..." I looked at him anxiously with a clear lack of understanding. He has never been like that before.

"Smile at him a lot and often... and show that you really care," he whispered weakly, sniffing. He touched my lips slowly with his fingertips. "You smile so beautifully, Mark..." he said softly, kissing me gently on the lips. "Please, keep smiling at him..." I didn't know why he has such a bad mood today but maybe it wasn't a good time to discuss it in any particular way. That's why I just gave him a quick kiss and closed tightly in my arms.

~>x<~

that's last but one 'x' chapter