What to do now. *book two*

I hate everything

When I eventually feel less like shit, I go to the studio.

"Hey Damien Jean!" Erick greets me.
"Hey."...

The first few weeks I was there wasn't as bad as it would soon be, for me.

We were almost done filming the film when the director decided he wanted to start again, but he wanted my character to be male instead of female and we all groaned and nagged but went with it.

It was torture.

The other crew members always judged me and bullied me and sometimes I got beaten up.

The director was horrible too. He groped and grabbed at me and touched me when I didn't want him to, and he hurt me.

And now I'm in a storage cupboard, having a panic attack, when he walks in and grabs me.

"NO!!" I scream, "NO!! NO STOP!!"

He unbuckles my belt and manages to get off all of my clothes and ties my arms to my sides and gags me as I try to fight him off.

I kick my legs back at him as he pins himself against me and hurts me again.

He's more painful this time, and I scream and cry and shout and kick and the flash backs come flooding into my mind.

Flash backs from the first time he hurt me. Flash backs from when I was trapped in the CCA. Flash backs from when Lord Luper was possessed. Flash backs from when I was with Andrew, when I was living with Felix And Clara Callas.

I scream muffled, and shut my eyes tight, as The director pushes me down to the floor and stands in front of me.

I felt him remove the gag and I take this a good time to scream.

Bad time. Really bad time, because he was right in front of me, stood up and I was being held to the floor.

He quickly shuts me up and holds my head up.

When he eventually leaves me alone, and gets dressed, and I move against the shelf, away from him.

He then replaces the gag and hits the shelf, making me jump.

He laughs and leaves me all alone. I feel streams of liquid running down my back and burning my skin.

I can smell bleach and other cleaning products.

It's hurting my lungs, but the liquid, whatever it is, is burning the rope as well as my skin and I tug at the rope and it eventually breaks.

I remove the gag and ropes and then I try to clean my back, or at least get the excess cleaning fluids off, but my head is spinning and I begin to feel nauseous, whilst getting my jeans on, and I eventually pass out...

I was found by a janitor.

I was immediately rushed to hospital.

My whole body now aches and my back is burning and feels like it's on fire.

I keep screaming at the pain in my body.

They're prodding and poking at my back and I'm still crying and screaming.

They rub my back with something and wrap bandages around my torso.

When they stop checking me, they take me to an empty room and I lie there, not wanting to move.

I'm so tired.

I just want to go asleep, but then an officer walks in, "we checked the security footage, near where we found you. Why did you go in there?"
"I was having a panic attack..."
"Okay. We've taken in the man who went in after you, for questioning, one of my men is questioning him now. Mind if I ask you a few?"
"Don't have a choice, do I?"
"How many times has he done this to you?"
"What?"
"Raped you. How many times has he raped you?"
"I... every time we were alone..."
"Which was how often?"
"Very because none of the other cast liked me... and I just wanted to be by myself, but he... he thought otherwise..."
"Okay. That liquid that we found on your back was a mix of bleach, acetone and hydrochloride acid. I've been shown images of the burns on your back."
"Okay..."
"How come you passed out?"
"I... I think it was the fumes... something was making me nauseous..."
"Okay. There's bruises on your body, is that just from him?"

I shake my head.

"No?"
"Some of the other cast members are really mean to me... they bullied me and sometimes beat me up..."
"Why would they do that?"
"Because I'm a Half Breed... they even cast me as a villain in the film..."
"That's rude, I've never seen Half Breeds as villains, I don't see Why people do."
"Exactly..."
"Did he bind you?"
"What?"
"We found rope amongst the excess burning fluids."

I nod, "they somehow burned the rope..."
"I ask because they found ligature marks around just above your elbows and across your stomach and back. They had to Stich up these scars on your face as well. Apparently, the man had gone back in a short while later, and he sliced your face from the corners of your mouth to your ears. We're just surprised you're still alive."
"I can't die."
"Oh."
"So I can't just... get rid of the pain... and kill my self..."
"Hey hey hey."

He walks over and sits on the edge of the bed, and rests his hand on my cheek, "why would you want to kill yourself?"
"Have you ever heard of the CCA?"
"Yeah."
"About fifty years I spent in there."
"Holy shit. What were your fears?"
"At first, abuse, rape, tight spaces, losing control and being controlled. That was for three years."
"I thought that it usually took maximum a few months for someone to conquer their fears?"
"Well, they didn't do the last two because they couldn't risk a half breed losing control, but it took me three years. And that was only the first time they put me through shit like that."
"What happened the next time?"
"They asked me about two more fears, without telling me that they were going to put me through the trails again, so I said drowning and mirror mazes."
"How long did that go on for?"
"Forty seven years about?"
"Shit, I'm sorry kid."
"Kid? I'm two hundred years old."
"Oh. Well, you LOOK younger than me."
"Oh, okay. How old are you?"
"Forty eight."
"I'm physically twenty five."
"Well then, you're physically old enough to me my kid, therefore, I'm calling you kid."
"Right, okay. Any more questions, or can I go to sleep?"
"You can go to sleep. I'll sit over there and make sure that no one bothers you."...