Eden

Chapter 36

Lexa POV

The past few days have been a blur. Abby threw herself into work to distract herself and work an unhealthy amount. Madi had shut down completely. She hasn't said a word to anyone since Clarke died. Lexa didn't see much of Aden or Nova. Everyone was grieving. The news was slowling starting to spread that something happened to their beloved Hedatu. Lexa didn't care or wanted to stop it.

Lexa hit rock bottom. She didn't sleep in their bed. She would either sleep on the couch or in the woods. She spent most her time out in the woods, just walking. She didn't feel good mentally or psyhical. Octavia would come by and make her eat, but other than that she didn't eat. She would go to the trainning area and would let warriors beat her up, hoping that it would make her feel better. It didn't. It felt like her heart was broken into pieces.

It was almost noon. She was sitting on the floor, by the coffee table in the living room looking at Clarke's drawings. Most of them were from the six years. Tom's dropship. Nova's pod. The village that they stayed at. Madi when she was still very young. Aden from when he was a teenager. There were a ton of drawings of her. A drawing of the rover.

She traced her finger over Clarke's signture, gently. It was simple but it fit her. It was just 'CG'. It was in the left hand corner of every drawing.

Her head was pounding, probably from dehydation and hunger. She barely ate this morning when Octavia stopped by. Octavia has tried to help her but she wouldn't let her. All Octavia would do is bring her food from a shop and not leave until she ate.

She felt tears start to fall down her face when the door opened. She quickly wiped them and flipped the drawings over. She looked up and saw Octavia. She was holding small bag that had food in it. She walked over and placed it on the coffee table.

"Eat." Octavia said, pointing at the bag.

"I did." Lexa said, moving the drawings away. "This morning."

"Lexa. You are acting like a child." Octavia took out the food from the bag. "I'm not putting up with your acts. I'll shove it down your throat if you don't." She put a soup in front of her with some bread.

Lexa got up with the drawings in hand. She started towards the bedroom to put the drawings back but Octavia grabbed her. She jerked away and Octavia went to reach for the drawings but she pulled away just in time. Octavia stood up and blocked her path. "Move Octavia."

"Eat and then you can go back to being depressed." Lexa tried to move passed Octavia but she stopped her. Octavia grabbed the drawings and hit her wrist. She let go and she moved the drawings behind her. "Eat and you'll get them back." Lexa tried to get them back but Octavia was stronging and healthier so she couldn't do anything against her. "Eat or I'll make you eat."

"You already are." Lexa mumbled, sitting back down. She was pissed off. She started to eat. She felt a little better after eating but she somehow also felt worse. She was about half way done. "I ate. Give me the drawings."

Octavia spilt the stack in two and handle her one. "You'll get the rest when you finish." Lexa mumbled, mockingly under her breath. Octavia either didn't hear or she didn't care. It took about fourty-five minutes for her to finish. Octavia gave her the drawings and left.

As the food started to settle in her stomach, she started to feel sick. Her body probably wasn't used to that big of a portion. She laid down on the couch and the drawings were on the table. She laid there and starred at the ceiling.

She laid there for who knows how long. It could have been three hours or three minutes. One part of her was screaming to go get revenge while another was screaming in pain. She didn't know what to do. She wanted to go to war but she didn't have the engery.