Crimson Eyes ~ Sequel to: The Valkyrie, An Obi-Wan Story (completed)

Chapter 40: The Hunt

A new sketch I'm working on ^^ :)

I am not enough.

I pulled my suitcase from the closet, throwing it on the bed and pulling it open. Not enough. I threw whatever I could grasp into it, clothes, notepads, papers and books. All thudded on the surface and almost instantly fell back to the ground. Not enough. There was another hour until dawn, an hour until I had to leave the planet I'd grown to love.

Another hour before I was to be locked up again like some wild animal, all because he was afraid history would repeat itself.

I am not her! My own mind seemed to taunt me with the words. No, no you're not. His voice had been so full of spite, of pure hatred. I'd never heard him speak like that before, especially not to me. Even now they echoed through my head and tortured me endlessly.

When it became too much I leaned my hands on the cabinet, nails digging into the wood and leaving scratches on the surface. Teeth clenched together and eyes pressed chut, I tried my hardest to suppress the scream that was trying to reach the surface. Tears slid down my cheek but no sound could slip out. There was a storm raging within me and I was afraid to let it go free.

I am not enough, never had been. Looking up I stared into the mirror, noting my bloodshot eyes and the dark coal running down my cheeks. I had changed into this, this broken doctor following that damned jedi everywhere he went, following orders like some damned pup. I'd gladly accepted his request in aiding him in a mission, thinking it was some kind of favour he did me, while it had been his fault I'd been locked up in the first place. And still, he'd sent me away like garbage because of one lie.

Just one. I had given up my whole kingdom, left my world and my status, and he couldn't even see past one goddamned lie.

Suddenly, that scream did escape. The entire building seemed to roar with it, the foundation groaning with the force as objects fell to the ground. It was a storm of rage, fury. It resonated through my entire body as I lashed out with my arm, throwing the suitcase to the ground and watching the contents scatter over the surface.

There I stood in the end, seething, trying to will my breathing to calm. In the mirror I could see my skin lighting up with flames, glowing currents like tiny veins dancing over my skin. That fire was raging within me but I couldn't let it out. Or else, else I'd only confirm that I was indeed a monster.

I closed my eyes, focussing. I could hear the commander and his trooper outside, shuffling on their feet, trying to decide whether they should enter. In the distance there were more people, all going about their business, oblivious to the storm that was raging within me. Slowly but surely my body calmed down until it could hear but 4 words.

I am not enough. Somehow, I accepted it as a simple truth and shut down any emotion that came with that realization. There was nothing else I could do, anyways, not without tearing apart at the seams. My heart hardened and a feeling as cold as ice ran through me. My mouth pulled into a thin line as my eyes opened, going over the mess I'd made.

There, on the floor, they spotted the black shoulder guards adorned with the golden phoenix. Its wings were spread wide, shining golden in the sunlight. Scattered around it were the other pieces of the ancient Fireheart armor, the scales and the belt, the red and golden cape. I had brought the armor with me but had never worn it since that hearing. No, this whole time it had been there, hidden on the bottom of my suitcase.

It hadn't seen the sun in more than 6 months. Yet, lying there, it awoke a fire within me. A growing urge, a resistance that simply told me no. It had been enough; I'd bowed enough to men that didn't deserve it. I was not going to let them drag me into another ship. Maybe it was pride that drove me but I didn't care. All I knew that they had crossed a line, and I was not about to follow them blindly.