alone again / Finished BxB /

money talks

Xiever is still here in my apartment. He is still washing the same old dishes i left out when i had such a bad headache that i cant even move. Hes a caring soul i can feel that. If i want him here were im exposed and he can see how i live, No . I would rather shield everything off.

He can smell the weed coming off of me or from the bathroom. He can see the dishes hes cleaning off. He can see the dirty clothes everywhere and stuff i shouldve cleaned ages ago. I feel like he can see my whole life with this one room, which is meessy.

I dont think hes the one who likes messy. He cleans up the stuff and puts the dirty clothes in a corner for me to clean up. Maybe he feels bad i live like this ? Or he just wants to feel better about himself.

People are fucked up and so am i.

He cleans the room while i just stand. Both of us not even saying a word. I can tell if this silence is comforble or awkward but it doesnt matter.

The only person i ever had over was dean and 1 time my parents when they helped me move in. I never liked having people in my personal space. I used to have my older friends over when the apartment was still clean but thats really it.

I want to kick him out of here and tell him that i dont want him here but he owes me money for the not even worth 50 cents pasta.

He cleans up the last dishes and then a bit more of the living room. I stand infront of my bedroom door. The only place were i dont want him in is my bedroom. Its a even bigger mess and it makes me even more exposed.

He shoved the pile of clothes with his feet to the door i was standing. "Is your washing machine there?" He asks me. He got a soft warm tone to it. I feel like im talking to some child protection services again. Stupid fucking people. Theyre acting like their the best and doing a good thing but they werent to me.

When i dont awnser he tries to get past me and puts his hand on doorknob but i take his wrist in my hand and take it off the doorknob.

He looks at me confused and tries to push me away. I keep holding his wrist in my hand. he cant get pased. "I dont want u in my bedroom" i finally awnsered being able to talk again.

He just shrugs at me and pick me up by my legs and sats me down on the now cleaned coutch. I try to stop him but he speed runs to the door. He smiles at me and just openeds the door and pushes the pile into the washer that was unfortunately in my bedroom.

I rush into the bedroom and he grabs my wrist so i wont punch him. Hes stronger then me and i cant get lose of his grib. "I said stay away!" i yell at him. I dont want him to see this mess and get embarrassed about it.

Im pissed of he broke my rule. The one rule i had he can fuck off i dont ever wanna see him. He can judge me. He knows im a mess. He knows im fucked up.

"Calm down princess" he says to me to make me even more angry. "princess!?" I ask him angry. He knows what hes doing. He wants to see me pissed of at him "i got a dick im not a princess bitch!" I tell him and he laughs at me. 

Why is he laughing does he think its so funny ?! Hes in my space and i cant get him to leave. "Fine fine" he says jokingly and roles his eyes in a funny way and lets go of my wrists when i calm down a bit.

Why is he even here?

He walks out of the bedroom with his hand infront of his eyes to make fun of me for me not wanting him to see my room. I close the door behind me and was ready to yell at him.

"You still want your food or are you going to call me a bitch again?" He says to me eoth a pleased look and i shut out whatever i just wanted to say to him. I grab my jacket he just gave back and push him out of the door. I close the door behind me and lock it.

"You should hire a cleaner" xiever tells me as a joke. "When i die they will clean it for free" annoyed i tell him and put on the hood of my jacket. "Youre not dying soon anyways" he tells me like he knows me.

I just stay quiet. He doesnt know i dont see me around in the future. He walks with me out of the apartment complex onto the bus to the restaurant.

I dont have any money with me and my card doesnt work. I am just praying at this point the bus driver doesnt notice. I need food after this asshole just threw it out.

I pull up my face mask so if they catch me i can just run. I try to scan the card and it declines but i just keep on walking . This isnt the first time i had to do it.

When my mom and dad didnt give me any bus money i had to do this too and way to much to the point i got used to it.

Xiever followes me and i see his card accepts it. Money talks. He followes me to the back of the bus and sits next to me as if there werent any other places available.

Xiever grabs his phone out of his pocket and writes something on it. "Dash" he wispers and shows me his phone. 'You dont have a pass?' It says. I shake my head. He probably is judging me for being poor. After seeing my apartment and seeing my card declined he probably thinks even less of me.

The bus ride was around 15 minutes. I was glad when we arrived so i didnt have to sit so close to him and so i knew i was save and didnt get caught.

When we got off the bus he grabs my wrists and pulls me to one of those pay machines for your bus card.

"Give me the card" he demends. Putting out his hand. When i dont give him one he just grabs it out of my pocket like its the most normal thing ever. Hes in my space space . He already went into my room i dont think i can take this. This man needs to learn about personal spaces.

I hope after today hes gone and i wont see him again. He grabs the card and puts 5$ on it. Just enough for around 3 to 4 busrides. Money talks.

"Thanks" i say to him when he hands me back my card. But before he fully gives it to me he turns it around and looks for the photo that was on there.

I try and grab the card but he holds it above his head and i try to jump for it but hes taller then me so i cant reach it. "You look funny" he says and laughs at me. "I dont, now give me it" i say angry but not really

The photo on the card was old. I was around 16 when my old friends took that photo of me at a party.  I had a party hat on and i was doing a cross eyed face and blown up cheeks. No idea how that photo got approved but it did.

I grab the card back and roll my eyes. Why does he always try and get into my comfort space.

We walk to a tiny chinese restaurant at the back of the city Square. Xiever walks trough the door and 2 older ladys come up to him and get him a seat and speak to him in chinese like they know them their whole life.

Maybe they did know him long ? I dont know him even a bit .

"There my aunts" he smiles at me in a embarrassed way. And he walks to a table and yells something at them. "What do you wanna eat?" He asks me and hands me the menu .

My american dutch ass doesnt know shit about chinese food how will i choose. "Uh you choose something that tastes good" i tell him and xiever yells somehing again.

The restaurant is older looking but got comfortable style. Its more brown and shades of old fated white to cream wall paper and some tiny plants here and there.

"Does your family own this restaurant?" I ask him . "Yeah when my grandparents came here they bought this with the little money they had" he tells me and looks proud at his words.

Hes a man of pride i can tell. 

His aunts come back with a few plates of food. It looks delicious and amazing. Better then the trash pasta i was about to eat. "Were supposed to share there little side dishes and we both have our own rice" he explains to me and i dig in.

Its amazing i never had such good food. "Thanks" i say to him when were almost done. I didnt even speak a word and just kept on eating . "You look like a hungered out dog" he says. I chuckle a lilttle while stuffing my face with the food.

AHHH okay thats it for this chapter hope you like ittttt