Secretive - Kotlc Human AU - Hidden Series Book 1

Chapter 46

Tam's POV

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Where is she? 

I've checked everywhere in the house, careful not to wake everyone up.

I run outside, breathing laboured, and I whirl my head aorund, trying ot see where she could have gone.

I run around, trying to push power into my legs.

What if they really took her?

Visions of horrible things happening to Sophie fill my head.

"You look like a ravaging lunatic running around like that."

I whirl around, trying to pinpoint the voice.

A chuckle rings out, and I look up.

A relieved sigh escapes me as I see her peeking down from the ceiling.

She waves her hands up, and I activate my boots to get to her.

I sit down next to her, panting.

"What in the heck, Sophie! I looked everywhere for you!" I whisper yell at her.

She rolls her eyes. "I know. You seriously looked non compos mentis." 

I hiss at her, brushing a finger through my bangs. "This is serious, Sophie! Are you out of your mind?!" 

She leans back on her hands, dangling her legs over the side of the roof.

"I... anyways, you shouldn't worry like that. I can take care of myself."

I stare at her, hard. Then I sigh, reaching over to touch her hand. "You can't stop me, or any of us, from worrying, Sophie."

"You're my friend."

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Sophie's POV

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Ouch.

Seriously?

He friendzoned me?

My heart deliberatly shatters into a million pieces, and I make sure not to show anything on my face.

"Sorry for worrying you, Tam. I'll make sure it doesn't happen again." My voice comes out robotic and devoid of any emotion.

I think he realises what he did, because horror flickers over his features for a second before he composes himself.

Desperate to change the subject, I shake my head. "Tam, you should sleep. It's really early."

He shrugs. "Sleep hates me."

I bark out a laugh. "Yeah, same. Anyway though, I have some stuff to take care of."

I stand up, and turn around.

Something warm wraps around my hand, and pulls me back.

"No. You don't need to work or stress at 2 in the morning." He says, pulling me hard enough to make me plop back down next to him.

I shrug, rolling my eyes. "I mean... I don't really have anything better to do..."

He grunts. "So, stress is more fun than sitting here with me?"

I roll my eyes. "I have to think about that."

He rolls his eyes. "You wound me, Sophie."

I shrug again.

He looks over at me, concern lacing his features. "Why are you up here anyway?"

I look away. "I needed fresh air."

He raises his eyebrows. "Nightmare?"

I look at him in horror. "Is it that obvious?"

If he knows, then the others must too, right?

You messed up, Sophie.

He shakes his head. "Only if you know what to look for."

After a minute of silence, I change the topic.

I waggle my eyebrows at him. "So, are you asking Biana to the ball?"

He stiffens, but we both pretend that what happened between us didn't happen at all.

He sighs. "I don't think she's gonna say yes-"

I cut him off. "Tam, she's head over heels for you."

I stand up, and he doesn't reach for me this time.

I start walking back to the door that leads back downstairs, then remember something. 

"Oh, and Tam?"

He looks at me, confused.

I smirk.

"Her dress is light pink."

I walk back downstairs, and do the pattern to get to my quiet room.

The familiar black walls greet me as the first tear leaks out.

Then another.

Then another.

Soon enough, I'm silently sobbing, my shoulders shaking.

I fall to my knees, and I imagine Tam in a suit with a light pink tie, the same color as Biana's dress.

I rock back and forth hugging my knees.

After I'm all cried out, I grab a pen and paper and I just write out my feelings.

You know you love me, I know you care

Just shout whenever and I'll be there

You are my love, you are my heart

And we will never ever ever be apart

I pour my heart and soul into this song, and I hold up the final piece.

I write another song.

And another.

And another.

Soon, I have a stack of heart-broken, rejection, or sad songs.

But I can't sing all of them, that would be stupid.

And, I can't only have sad songs if I'm known for diversity.

I try to remember a happy moment, and I write that down.

And another.

Finally I have one happy song in the midst of at least 10 sad ones.

I chuckle darkly.

This is what happens when you fall in love.

You become vulnerable, and that shouldn't happen.

You become sad, too focused on feelings, and that shouldn't happen.

Love breaks you.

I look in the mirror, stand up straighter, and square my shoulders.

I am Sophie Elizabeth Foster, and I don't fall in love.