Drop Dead | Sam Fender

Chapter Ninety Five

Sam

I groaned as I knocked urgently on Rory's front door for the third time within the last minute, the events of last night replayed at the back of my head as I willed it to open. I was flooded with a mixture of regret and anger when I awoke this morning. I ruined things. Again. Spewing out poisonous words with the intention of relaying my hurt and anger to someone else like a wild animal that felt threatened. Like I always did.

"Sam?" It was Jamie.

"Is Rory there?" I asked hesitantly, unsure of what she had told the man who had become a second father since I met him. Things had been tough between us after what happened a couple of months ago and we were finally starting to mend the relationship we had before, only for me to go and fuck it up again.

"She left for London about an hour ago now... She didn't tell you she was leaving?" he frowned.

"Shit!" I cursed, running a hand over my face in frustration. "I wasn't expecting her to have left already."

"She said there wasn't anything keeping her here anymore," he told me, eyeing me suspiciously. I was the one keeping her here? "Sam, kidda. I don't know what's happened between the two of yous but you'll get through it. Yous always do."

"I don't think there's any coming back from this," I mumbled, my head hanging low in shame.

"This got anything to do with the state on your face?" he inquired, crossing his arms over his broad chest as he leaned against the door frame.

"Er, I got into a fight last night," I muttered in embarrassment, rocking between my feet as his previous lectures about my anger issues replayed at the back of my mind. He had been right. I had hurt Rory again and she had finally gotten fed up.

"Ya want to come in and talk about it?" he asked, the concern rife in his tone.

"No! Er, no, it's alreet. Thank you for the offer," I stumbled over my words. "I'd better be gan home."

"Yer know my doors always open, Sam. Yous are all like my bairns. Whether you and Rory are on good terms or not," he assured me with a soft smile, although it did little to settle the sinking feeling in my stomach, instead exacerbating it.

"Cheers, Jamie," I smiled weakly, "I'll see yer later."

I clenched my jaw as he shut the door, letting out a frustrated yell as I fished my phone from my pocket. Calling Rory's number, I lifted my phone to my ear as I walked towards Dean's house, hoping that our mutual best friend had heard from her. I frowned as the call went almost immediately to voicemail, as though Rory had purposefully ended it.

Fuck, she really must be sticking to her guns, I thought to myself.

Aurora

I stared down at my phone which was lit up with a picture of Sam and me from his birthday last month, desperately trying to keep the tears at bay. I made the spontaneous decision to leave for London at 8 in the morning and currently sat in an empty booth on a train to London Paddington. I closed my eyes as I pressed the decline button, not being able to bring myself to block his number just yet. I was still holding onto the hope that this wouldn't be it for us, but I couldn't keep running back to him after everything we'd gone through.

We all know yer wouldn't last a week.

His words rang over and over in my head. He was right. I never did. And if I wasn't moving to London I probably wouldn't this time either but I couldn't go running back. I couldn't do it anymore. As much as I loved him, it wasn't healthy. For either of us. I deserved better and so did he. I just hoped that one day we could be friends again.