If I had met you in grey

Chapter 81

Tobias POV

I said goodbye to tris after breakfast, she asked once again if I was sure I wanted to go alone. I would've liked her to come but I know my mother doesn't particularly like her, and as much as tris tries to hide it, she doesn't like her either. And the things I'd like to discuss with my mother are better done just between the two of us. I'm walking through the factionless sector, and I'm still flabbergasted at this place. Although I've been here many times now, it's still impressive for people who don't have much, or so it would seem.

"Tobias! What brings you by?" Evelyn asks as she opens the door for me. She looks behind me, probably to see if tris is with me. "I wanted to talk with you." I tell her. She lets me in, we go to the kitchen again and take a seat at the table. The table has a dark red table cloth spread out over it and the chairs are wobbly wooden. "What would you like to discuss?" She asks using a kind voice, instead of the voice she used when I was here with tris. "Its not about that girl is it?" My mother asks. My hands clench underneath the table and luckily she doesn't notice.

I open my mouth to say something but of course she goes ahead and speaks before I get the chance. "I heard that you beat up your father?" She asks. "I wouldn't really call him that but yes. I did." I answer. She smirks and chuckles lightly. "I can understand why you wouldn't want to call him that." "Just like I wouldn't want to call you mother." I say leaning back in my chair, arms crossed in front of my chest.

"And why would that be Tobias?" She asks softly. "Because you were hardly a mother." I tell her, she scoffs at that. "How so?" She asks. Its a trap, trick question, yet I still answer.

"You left me. Abandoned me, and not to mention leaving me with a monster!" I say, my voice getting louder as the words come out. Her mouth opens but now it's me cutting her off. "You only cared about saving yourself. You didn't even think of your own child." Her eyes close for a second but reopen without any new emotion. "He hurt me, and hurt me. Your own son, being beaten by his own father. His own blood. And when you had the chance to leave, to escape. You never looked back nor did you bring your son along." I say.

I'm quite surprised that I'm not yelling or ripping her head off. "Tobias.. you don't understand-" "I guess I don't. I cant comprehend how you could just leave me, there to get tortured and now..." I begin laughing lightly. "And now you want to begin again. Have this great relationship, after leaving me!"

Now... Now I'm standing. Now the chair has been thrown onto the floor, now I'm yelling. "Tobias listen to me. I'm sorry. Really truly I am. But you have to forgive me." She says as if it is nothing. Nothing to forgive her, to forgive the pain she caused me, the pain I was left to endure.

"No. No, I cant. You see this as an opportunity that will benefit you, not me. I've lived most of my life without you, what's the difference now??" I say. The only thing I did that she asked was calm down.. A little. She stays silent but doesn't move her eyes off me, I know she wants to say something, but for the first time she's speechless, unsure of what to say. I go pick the chair back up, put it back at the table, and take one last look at her. Then I turn, and walk out. Never turning back.