Live|Laugh|No Love

14

🎹I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you🎹
🎵The reason🎵
-Hooastank-

The cause of me sweating makes me stir in my sleep. I squint my eyes open realizing I had actually fell back asleep and didn't wake up in a panting mess. I open my eyes fully and let the blurry vision focus. I noticed I'm still in Louis bed, yea definitely still in his bed. Sometime throughout the night we have ended up cuddled up into each other. One of my arms are under his neck and and the other one is around his body holding him. His head is tucked into my chest with one of his arms curled into his chest and the other draped around me. I blink a few times looking at our position. I've never actually cuddled with someone, I've always had sex and that was it, nothing Intimate but this, I like this, I like the feeling I have doing this with him. I can feel my hand start tingling from falling asleep under his neck. I try wiggling my hand just a bit to make the feeling come back but end up waking him when I do. His head lazily moves upward off my chest. His sleepy eyes opening up to focus. When they are focused and opened completely his bright baby blues look at me.

"Oh! Sorry." He says trying to make distance between us but I just rest my hand on his back.

"Don't be, I like it." I tell him with a small grin.

"You like cuddling?"

"I've never cuddled someone before." I lightly laugh. He chews the inside of his cheek.

"But now that I have, yea I like it." (But only with you.) He's quite still chewing on his cheek nervously. I think maybe he thought I'd freak out and tell him to get off of me. I normally would have but there's something about him that dosent make me feel that way.

"Have you done it before?" I ask him curiously.

"What? Cuddling?" He nod twice.

"Yea, I have.." he says looking at me then back to the small space between us he created. Something inside of me makes me tense and feel weird when he says he's cuddled with someone.

"With who?"

"Why do you want to know?"

"Just something to talk about."

"His name is James." He didn't use past tense.

"Is? Do you still talk to him?"

"I do yes."

"Is he like a friend or ex or something?" Harry what the hell does that matter! Why are you asking all of this?

Louis squirms around a little bit.

"He's was my boyfriend, ex now and now he's my friend." He tells me.

"You talk to your ex?"

"Yes I do. He was the only other gay person at my school, so we really understood each other and once we called things off." He shrugs.

"We stayed best friends." I move my hand and rub the back of my neck.

"Why?" Louis asks me looking up at me. My brows were drawn together.

"How much do you guys talk?"

"Harry why are you asking so many questions about my ex, now best friend?" He chuckled but I don't find the amusement in it for some reason. I feel a hint of anger? No, no that's not the right word.

Jealousy.

Am I fucking jealous? I don't do jealousy, I've never been the jealous type. Seems I've not been or done a lot of things until this sassy little blue eyed fucker came into my life.