Deviator

Disobedience

2039
Heidi

"Here," I put the bottle of water against his lips. "You need to drink this."

Jace turns his head away from me while groaning silently. I can tell he is dehydrated and malnourished. He has refused to eat much and barely drinks anything either. It's like he is trying to starve himself to death.

"Please, Jace. Just take a few sips."

"Leave me alone..." he mumbles without looking at me.

If he keeps this up, I'm going to have to force-feed him.

"I can't do that, Jace. You need your strength. I'm not letting you die here."

"Why not?" he asks and slowly looks up at me with hatred in his eyes. "it's not like you have ever really cared for me."

"Don't say that. You know I love you." I reply but he just snorts in response. He doesn't believe me. But I do love him. I don't understand why he thinks that I have never cared for him. "At least just drink this." I say as I put the bottle against his lips again. He refuses once more.

"I don't want your goddamn water! I don't want anything from you. You are crazy! Just like your dad!"

I step backwards as his words hits me like steel knives.

"You don't know what you are talking about." I say in response, but he just continues.

"How can you just stand by as people die or get sick, knowing your father is behind it? I don't even recognize you anymore."

"We are helping people!" I shout. I don't want to hear his false accusations. "Dad is working on a cure right now! That's why we need you. To test it out." I smile. I'm proud of our accomplishments. I know there has been a few errors, but I am living proof, that my father can help people.

"Bullshit." He spits out the word like poison. "You are the reason the world is going to hell."

"That's not true." I grab his throat and forces him to look at me. "We are the ones fixing it after everyone else broke it. We are not to blame for the pandemic. My father has just been trying to improve the human body and mind." I grab the scalpel from the table next to me. "And he has succeeded." I push the blade against my skin and blood starts to run from the wound. Jace stares in disbelief as the skin slowly closes back up again. "I'm the success. I'm his greatest achievement."

"What the..." he mumbles as he glares at me.

"I was the first of his experiments. He brought me back to life. Then he used that formular to save people from the virus. I can only heal from small wounds, but he improved that in the new formular.  Unfortunately, there were a few errors and side effects, but we are working on correcting them now. We will take everything that makes the creatures strong and use that while we will remove the side effects. My father's name will go down in history as the one who improved humanity. Then no one will even remember the few failures along the way."

"The few failures?" Jace shouts. "People are dying! Humanity is almost extinct!"

"No! we are just eliminating the weakest specimens. The result will be tremendous. Just wait and see."

"You are insane..." Jace mutters as he looks at me. "How can I ever have loved you? You have no respect for human life..."

"That's not true..."

"It is true! You think that everyone is disposable, if you just get what you want!" he shouts, and his words cuts me deeper than I thought they would. "You are a monster! Just like your father." The way he looks at me with clear disappointment breaks my heart. "At least now I can die peacefully knowing I made the right decision in loving Clary instead of you. She is a far better person than you ever were..."

I turn around and run out of the room. Out of the house. I can't hold back the tears that starts streaming down my face. Why won't he love me? Can it really be true that he loves Clary more than me? And does she love him? Does she even deserve him at all? I need to find out.

Determined I head towards section A. I need to talk to Clary. So, we can settle this once and for all.

****

I sneak inside the Morgenstern mansion through the hidden corridor that Valentine has used to sneak me and my father in and out of for years. Undetected, I make my way to Clary's room. So far, so good. I spot her lying on the bed, but I don't think she is sleeping.

"Clary Morgenstern?" I ask in my most gentle voice. No reason to scare her or make her uncomfortable. Not yet anyway.

"Yes?" she pulls herself up from the bed and that's when I notice her belly. "Is it time for my tea?" she asks, probably mistaking me for one of her servants.

"You're pregnant?" I ask dumbfounded.

"Yes." She smiles. "I can't really hide it anymore."

"Who is the father?" I ask although I'm certain I know the answer.

"Oh..." her cheeks turn slightly pink. "You don't know him. I met him outside the walls."

I can't stop starring at her beautiful round belly that contains Jace's child. The child that should have been mine. I don't know what to do. A piece of me wants to kill her and take the child, but at the same time I really want to know if she truly loves him. If she deserves to be loved by him.

"Are you talking about Jace?" I ask as I sit down on the edge of her bed. I study her reactions intensely. Shock is the first thing the shows on her face, then surprise. In the end - even though I hate to admit it - I can only see love beaming from her.

"You know him?" she asks and reaches out to take my hand. "How do you know him?"

I look down at her hand on mine. She is so excited. And so naive. Why isn't she questioning who I am? What I'm doing here and how I know about Jace.

"Yes, I know him. He is actually in The City right now..." I don't get to say more before Valentine enters the room. I can tell he has overheard our conversation because he is furious. He grabs me and drags me out of the room violently without even listening to his daughter's objections. But I can hear them. She is pleading him to let me go. To let me tell her about Jace.

"You stupid girl!" he shakes me violently before he continues to drags me along. "You should have kept you goddamn mouth shot!"

The entire way down to his personal underground transportation, he doesn't even care if someone sees us. Servants or Protectors alike. And to be honest, that scares me. Valentine has always scared me, but right now is even worse than ever before.

Once we arrive at my father's house, he drags me down to the basement where my father is. Valentine starts screaming at him, but all I notice is how Jace looks at me. I can hear Valentine shouting about my disobedience on telling Clary about Jace, but I focus only on Jace's eyes. Slowly I can see him change in the way he looks at me. I see hope and gratitude in his eyes.

"This girl is an abomination!" Valentine screams. "She should never have been allowed to live!"

Suddenly I feel a sharp cold metal blade against the skin on my throat. Warm thick liquid runs down my chest as he throws me to the ground. I try to scream, but only a gurgling noise escapes me. My father screams and grabs me. I can sense him being close to me, but all I see is the forgiveness I've prayed for in Jace's eyes. Or maybe I'm just imagining things.

As I'm drifting into nothingness, I hear my father screaming about revenge as he grabs a syringe and jabs it into Jace's neck. Then the world disappears to the sound of the love of my life screaming.