Amour [h.s]

☼ six ☼

"I could see a bloodbath coming, playing checkers as the flat was flooding"

☼ ☼ ☼
Trigger warning: mentions of suicide plans/thoughts/attempts.

Please look after yourself <3

Amelie

I'm not sure what it was, that possessed Harry to feel as though he had a duty to come here. But it also possessed me, to feel as though I had to share part of my story with him.

"Leo's getting assessed by the mental health team." I put it so simply. Yet it weighed so heavily.

He didn't say anything in return. He just kept his eyes on my little boy and nodded. He seemed to be keeping a lot of emotions in. But I wasn't one to talk.

"Do you want to come and see him?" I offer, both of us watching Milo like a hawk. I hadn't exactly planned for him to meet Milo like this, but he was here. And he seemed to care.

Harry looks at me in slight confusion. "Why would I want to see him?" He scoffs. The tone in his voice, shattering my soul.

That wasn't the reaction I was hoping for.

"Wha- Harry? Why not?" I choke out. His response was uncalled for. He could've just said he had plans and couldn't stay.

He looks at me in disbelief. "Amelie, your son is in hospital with hypothermia, and your husband is getting assessed by the mental health team. Forgive me for not wanting to see the man, who clearly has something to do with this" he says as a matter of fact. It only takes me a second to realise that he thought I meant Leo.

He thought I was going to introduce him to the man of the hour.

"Leo has nothing to do with this" I state firmly, not wanting to go into more detail than that. "But I meant Milo. Do you want to come and meet Milo?" I ask again, diverting the conversation.

His face pales as he realises I meant Milo. "Amelie, I'm so-" I cut him off, holding my hand out to stop him from talking.

"It's fine. if you want to come in, you have to make sure you wear your mask properly, the little girl at the end has an immune deficiency" I make sure to tell him.

"Amelie" he says carefully. "I'd love to meet him, but if you're uncomfortable with this, then I can just go home. As long as I know you're both okay, I'm happy" he tells me.

He seems very cautious of my feelings, and it's the first time someone has ever really cared about how I feel, and what I want. My opinions often just get kicked around in the dirt. They're never listened to. Especially not by Leo. I've just grown accustomed to knowing that my voice doesn't matter.