Amour [h.s]

☼ twelve ☼

"To live for the hope of it all"

☼ ☼ ☼

This is part of a double update, make sure you read chapter eleven first.

Amelie

We arrived in Glasgow yesterday morning, what was supposed to be a seven hour journey, quickly turned into a twelve hour journey, the traffic was hideous, though I mainly slept throughout the ride.

Harry is performing at the Ibrox stadium tonight, for over fifty thousand people. My brain can't exactly comprehend that about of people, but I imagine it to be chaos, in the best way. I was trying to think of all the fun I was going to have, rather than messing up on stage, in front of fifty thousand people, who are filming the entire thing.

I had never performed on a scale like this before. I had performed at pubs and small events when I was a teenager, but nothing like this. This was next level.

"It's big, innit?" Harry's voice breaks me out of my thoughts. I turn around to see him walking up behind me, his eyes squinting at the sun that beams down on the stage.

"Yeah" I whisper, looking back out at the stadium. "Do you ever get nervous?" I ask.

I look up at him to see him pouting slightly as he contemplates his answer. "I used to" he says simply. I'm not sure if he's going to elaborate, but she surprises me when he keeps talking. "I used to be a mess, like a total mess" he laughs lightly.

His hand reaches for my hand, I assume for comfort. "I- uh, I was on medication, all throughout the band, and then, I came off it, I had a few bad shows, where I just couldn't do it, so I went back on the tablets, done my theatre tour, I had a rough few months" he says looking down at our hands that were interlocked.

For one of the first times, he's being vulnerable with me.

"My- my uh, my step dad died, it messed me up for a long time" he breathes, unsure of his words. He keeps his eyes fixated on our hands, his thumb gently rubbing over my knuckles. I can see his eyes watering but he doesn't bring attention to it.

"Gosh, Harry, I'm so sorry, that must've been so hard for you" My chest deflates at his words. I couldn't imagine losing a step parent, or even a parent. Yet, he still decided to tour and release music, even when he was at his lowest point.

I mentally lost my family a long time ago, physically they're fine, as far as I'm aware. They weren't very happy that I had chosen to marry Leo, we got into an argument and we haven't spoken since my wedding day.

"It's life" Harry shrugs weakly.

"But to answer your question, no, I don't get nervous, not anymore" he steers the conversation away from his tough times.