Under That Niqab

30. Mysterious Caller

A/N: Trigger warning. Self harm, mention of blood, disturbing events. Read only if you're comfortable- You have been warned.

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Haya slowly batted her eye lashes open to fix her focus on the ceiling fan. Her surroundings were exceptionally bright, not what it always looked like when she wakes up, pitch black of midnight that is.

She trailed her eyes to the wall clock and when the time displayed on it was 9:20 she hurriedly got up from the bed. The sudden move wasn't anticipated by her body so she fell back down with a thud on the soft coir mattress. Waited for a while, sitting still with both her hands holding the mattress on her either sides, to adjust herself and then looked for her scattered slippers, upon finding them she made slow movements towards the door.

Given that Adnan had already left for work, it was no use making breakfast. She made way lazily to the bathroom having the walls and floors of marble which was used quite extensively, large mirror which was displayed behind the sink and she always hated looking into it, it was beautiful no doubt in that but it showed her the reality and that's what she actually hated.

She washed her face and stood looking at herself for mere two minutes after which her eyes caught something on her neck, tilting her head little bit to a side for getting a closer look she saw it was marked, deep red lines sprawled across her fair skin. Haya brought her fingers to touch it, mildly surprised that she wasn't feeling any pain she pressed her fingers more on the wounds.

Winced 'cause that triggered a little bit pain but that wasn't enough, she needed more.

She needed to feel more pain to make her feel alive. Like she's actually living and is not a dead corpse with died feelings.

So she pressed onto it more and more, gaze fixed on her neck through the mirror, until the skin tore and blood started coating her long slender fingers, the pain was still not enough for her yet she had to stop.

She stopped and leaned forward to look at it. It looked pretty bad but she wondered why was the pain not giving justice to the way the bruises looked.

Letting it go she washed the blood off her neck and patted it dry. She will be questioned if Adnan sees those wounds she knew that but still couldn't stop herself from doing it. She was excited to see her limit to endure pain, but if the marks freshen she'll be accountable, and that made her stop.

"I bought bandages and painkillers, not the antiseptic, damn it!" She muttered rummaging through the first aid box. "Guess I'll have to go, again" she took the empty tube out and sighed.

Haya wasn't even thinking about why she did, what she did, just that Adnan should not know about it. He will probably give her a tight slap making her hit on her head so that she will completely go insane, she chuckled at the thought.
I'm really going insane.

She turned to go out but the thought, it made her stop on her tracks.

Shavez. Shavez was there and he had seen her. Though it was days ago she felt terrified by the thought that she faced him. And if Adnan gets to know about it or of her little ventures he'll definitely kill her. Literally speaking.

So she turned that idea down and went back inside to apply the antiseptic, squeezing the tube for the last ounce of the cream left.

Memories were a curse for her, because she couldn't help but remember and recall those months after her mother's death, she almost started to believe that she can be happy too, almost. Though she didn't have the most important person with her, she had started to believe life can be bearable too.