Under That Niqab

48. The Confession

Shavez let out a high-pitched squeal of excitement as he felt elated at the thought of Haya being in his home. He never dreamed that this day would come, and now she was actually there, within the walls of his house.

Shavez didn't anticipate this moment, he simply remembered that he needed some papers and impulsively asked if she wanted to come to his house. But he was amazed that she agreed and now she was actually inside his house.

Shavez would repeat it over and over again just to convince himself that it was real. Undoubtedly true.

He meticulously searched through the numerous files stacked on his desk, dedicating a substantial amount of time, approximately five minutes, to locating the specific documents he required. Upon discovering them, he departed from the room and proceeded towards the staircase.

Instead of descending, Shavez remained stood by the stairs, looking down from above. He noticed that Haya's bag was on the sofa, but she was not in sight. He assumed that she was probably exploring his home.

Moments later, Haya emerged from the direction of the kitchen, which was not in Shavez's line of sight. She walked directly towards his bookshelf and held an old magazine in her hand. She compared its length to the rest of the books on the shelf, and upon finding a suitable spot, she neatly placed it in.

This simple, yet cozy gesture stung the strings in Shavez's heart, causing it to fill with love and admiration. A warm smile spread across his face at the thought of Haya being in his home every day.

She was roaming around without noticing his presence, all dressed in black only her fingers peeking out of the sleeves of the abaya she adorned.

Shavez stood there, mesmerized, watching her without even blinking. When Haya suddenly became aware of his gaze, her eyes immediately met his, and she was momentarily stunned, causing the cushion she was holding to drop to the floor.

Although he didn't intend to, his facial expression became incredibly serious and the smile that was previously there disappeared. His heartbeat accelerated as he stepped down the stairs mutely taking deeper breaths to calm himself.

"I was just- a-arranging," She said nervously picking up the cushion from the floor.

"What would you like to have, tea? or coffee?" as if he was bracing himself for something significant and unforeseen.

"N-nothing actually, let's leave if you are done"

"No way I'm letting you go" he declared, gazing intently into her eyes. Why was his heart pounding so erratically? He cursed inwardly.

"Sit here," he said, going towards the kitchen platform, it was an open area with a counter on the opposite side, a dining table by the counter, and a way towards the living room. Haya could see him because of the way the sofa was arranged.

"I don't really come here, so don't mind me searching for ingredients" he chuckled.

"I heard about your m-mom from him, she was a good woman, M-may Allah grant her Jannah," She said, her voice loud enough for him to hear.

"Aameen," He said, "You take sugar?"

"You don't really have to do that but yeah half a teaspoon"

"Of course, I have to," he said resuming his activities." you know life will never be the same again, and the thought of this lasting change terrifies me, I despise it"

"I wish I could console you by saying that eventually, we will learn to live, but no, everything becomes more difficult in my view," She says, more from experience.

She received a text from Rabi then, enquiring about her whereabouts, and promptly responded before returning her focus to him, placing the phone back.

"The emptiness left by her absence is overwhelming and cannot be filled. At times, I feel powerless and think that life would be easier to handle if she were still here."