nope

Chapter 28 - Jack are you high

"Sarah!" Travis whispered loudly "What are you doing?" He asked. I slowly rubbed my tear stained eyes and looked down at a confused and sleepy Travis. He looked mad but also worried. Well, I can't blame him for being mad. I mean, it is three in the morning.

"Trav" I blubber "I can't do it" I tell him, crawling onto the bed next to him. He raised his eyebrows and wiped the tears away from my eyes. He always does this. He treats me like his little sister which can get annoying, but whatever. I wasn't in the mood to argue with him.

"I don't want to talk about it" I mumble, digging my head deeper into the pillow. More tears flowed down my face. I, Sarah Williams, is a whore. I never really noticed until now. I'm a whore. A whore who can't keep her feelings to one person. I'm hurting so many people, liking Jack. 

"Bear, you can't just crawl into my bed crying and not tell me why you're here" He sighed. I smiled tiredly at him. He hasn't called me Bear since grade seven. He used to only do it when I was sad, because any other time I would slap him for it. I hated that nickname. 

"I don't love Finn" I mumble. My voice was shaky, and I hated it. Now it was official. I've said it, and it feels right. But I feel horrible. I can't break his heart, but I don't want to lead him on. "We were about to do things and it was really int-"

"Stop" He chuckled "Skip that part" I laughed slightly and nodded. Awkward.

"I stopped him and basically ran out of the room. I've been in the bathroom crying. While I was in there I've realised that I don't love Finn" A few tears fall again "I love Jack. As much as I don't want to, i do. He's in my mind, all the freaking time. I get jealous when he tries to work  things out with Layla, and..Finn just feels like me and you. A friend. A really good friend" I finish quietly

"Woah" He whispers "You actually admitted it" He sighs and sits cross legged on the bed. What was that supposed to mean? He already knew I liked him..

"What do I do?" I whisper "How do i face them both? How do I face Layla knowing that I want what she has? How?" I ask, sitting up with him. How am I supposed to face Finn, when he looks at me with such love?

"You can't choose who you love" He says softly, running his fingers through his hair. But Finn loves me. I know it. He looks at me like I mean the world to him. I know that if I jumped off a bridge, he would too. Would Jack? Probably not. He loves Layla. That's why he's been down lately, right? Because they're fighting?

"Why did I choose Finn, if I loved Jack?" I whisper to myself. Why did I tell Finn I loved him, when deep down I knew I loved Jack? I caused this. The question is though

How do I fix it, without breaking anyones heart? If I break Finn's heart, Jack will hate me and I will go back to not having anyone.

"Let's decide that tomorrow" He says, getting out of bed and walking over to his suitcase "For now though, chuck this on and get some sleep. It's three am!" He says, throwing me a big black shirt. It lands on my face then falls to my lap. Stupid shirt.

I grin sheepishly "Sorry" He turns his face into the pillow, and I take that as my queue to undress. Once i've got the shirt on, I slip under the covers with him and sigh "Thankyou Trav" I mutter, cuddling into the pillow.

"I love you, you know that right?' He asks, turning to face me. I nod and smile at him. He smiles back "Everything is going to be okay. I know that because I'm your best friend"

"I love you too, bestfriend" I mumble, drifting off into a not so peaceful sleep. 

---------------------

I slowly open my eyes and all the memories of last night come flooding back. The intense make out session. The crying. The realisation of not loving Finn. More crying. Waking Travis up. Crying. Talking about it. Crying. that was an eventful night

I sigh and get out of Travis' bed. He was still sleeping, so it mustn't be that late. I quickly walk out of his room and slip into mine and Finn's to change. Finn was still asleep, although he looked troubled. The usual, carefree face, now looked confused and disturbed. His eyebrows were knotted together, and his lips were slightly pouted. 

I quickly grab a shirt and a pair of pants and slip them on, then walk back out of the room. The tv was on, and Sawyer was sitting on the couch with a bowl of cereal. What is he doing up at seven in the morning? 

"Morning!" He chimes, swallowing the food in his mouth. I chuckle. Someone is too happy, for a morning. why do mornings even exsist? I mean, no one likes them..Except maybe Sawyer. 

"Morning" I mutter. My voice was croaky and it sounded like I had been crying. Great. 

"Long night I see" He smirks, winking at me. I gave him a questioning look. Why would he say tha-Wait.

Did he think i have a croaky voice because I gave Finn a- Oh.

"It's not what it sounds like" I blush furiously. He smirks and fills his mouth up with more cereal, then nods. I could tell he didn't believe me though. This is so embarrassing.

I chuck the  nearest pillow at his face but he dodges it, hugging his cereal in a fatel position 

"Hey!" He calls as i walk out of the lounge room "Not the cereal!" 

"Sick!" I call back, poking my tongue out at him as I walk out of the lounge room

I walk into the kitchen and grab a bowl out of the draw. I'm surprised when I see Jack sitting at the bench resting his head on his arms

"Jack?' I ask, after my heart had settled down a little bit. His morning hair was absolutely amazing. He wasn't wearing a shirt, which made it hard for me to breathe. Who does he think he is, sitting at the kitchen bench with no shirt on?

"Hm?" He croaks, looking up at me. He sounded tired. extrememely tired and looked like shit. massive bags were under his eyes, and his eyes were blood shot like he's been smoking weed. I know he hasn't been himself for the last couple of days, but now he looks sleep deprived

"You okay?" I ask him, standing next to him. he smelt horrible. He needs a shower, as soon as possible. He doesn't smell like his usual Vanilla and washing powder mixture, instead like B.O.

"Just peachy" He chuckles tiredly. "I need to tell you something.. About the fight me and Layla had. she kn-"

"Morning guys" Finn yawns. "Where did you go last night?" He mumbles, hugging me from behind. I sighed. What was he going to say about the fight? Why did he want to tell me? millions of questions were running through my mind. Damn Finn. 

"Sorry, I went to see Travis and I fell asleep in there" I lie. I watched as Jack walked out of the room, running into the wall on the way. Why can't he be the one to hug me? I want him to hold me like this.  

"We're going on a double date with Jack and Layla today" Finn grins "I think they need to be loved up a little, don't you?"He smirks, kissing my cheek. 

No

"Yeah" I lie. "Just what they need" 

preeeeeettttyyyyy short I know. I'm sorry. It's shit too. 

It's been a little while, i'm sorry. 

BUT I REALLY NEED YOU TO READ THE NEXT PARAGRAPH

If you ever. And I mean, ever. Need to talk to someone about something, you can always message me. I've been through some tough stuff too, and I understand how you feel. I love you and I just wanted to tell you guys that <3 

also, go and read my new 5SOS story :3 thanks. 

Love you guys x