wait// joshler

60

word count: 301

i watch joshua as he takes his bags and throws them in his parents trunk. 

"thanks for letting me go with him, dad."

"i know you two will have a.. sort of virtual relationship for a while. so i had to let you go."

"i'll be back tonight," i hug him and run after joshua.

i sit next to him in the backseat and wave to dad as mr. dun pulls out of their driveway.

i want as the trees sway in the wind. joshua pushes the windows down with his finger and i watch as the wind blows through his soft hair. and his soft eyes watch me as i watch him. 

i kiss his lips. wishing he never would leave me.

-

i help him take his bags to his room. 

"i love you." 

i tell him, over and over again.

"i love you too," he squeezes my hand.

"i'll text you when i get home."

"i'd love that," he replies.

"you're gonna do so great here. i know you will."

"i can't wait to see you on christmas break."

"we're gonna make it. i promise."

im trying to hold back the tears.

"we're.. i know.." the tears fall down his face and i run to him and baracade myself in his arms.

i let the tears fall, and just hold him in the silence.

we pull apart after im not sure how long.

"i love you," i say, trying to leave. because i know if i don't now, i never will.

"i love you too," he says.

"see you at christmas."

"see you at christmas, my love."

and the way he says it. stops me in my place like bricks. and i have to scrap and scratch myself to leave his dorm room.

god. i am his. 

 i don't want to wait. to see him again. i love him.

i finally have the fairytale life i has always wished i had.