willing to be your knight (Knight Series, #2)

45: Peace

Axl

This feeling of not knowing which was true and not has been wrecking me for days and weeks then. How would I move on from the past I could not remember and the more that I knew, the guiltier I grew.

I left Luke.

I left Dean.

And the fact that they still didn't know what was the reason why I left them behind was making me hate myself even more.

The past five years of my life has been a lie or should I say built on a lie. A lie that my dad had all planned out. I was vulnerable and he took advantage of it. He even used grandma to cover it all up. That's why I will never forgive that man.

"It must be heaven being a son of a billionaire."

"What a dream."

Hearing that was my whole entire life growing up. I never wish anyone to experience what I did growing up. That heaven they dream of? I had never experienced it. For me, it was a dream I have been wanting to wake up from.

It's hell.

"Honey? Are you okay?" I heard a woman's voice behind my back. I controlled all my emotions. She's still my mother and I don't want my anger to go over our relationship as a family.

"Did you know about me and Luke?" I tried to face her but I was so furious at her, I couldn't.

"Axl, what is this all about?" She seemed worried about what I asked all of a sudden.

Breathing deeply, I gathered courage and finally looked at her in the eyes. The eyes that were my last string every time my Dad would bring me to the chambers to torture me. The eyes that had me smiling every time I see it because it gave me hope that one day she'll save me from my Dad. Which she did not.

The eyes that I thought could save me.

"5 years ago. Graduation day." I started. "Ringing any bells, Mom?"

"I... I don't know what you're talking about." She stuttered before she faced backwards and was about to go out the door when I pressed the button on my remote and locked the door inside my office. "I have more important things  to do, Axl. You should've never called me in for this nonsense of you—,"

"Nonsense?!" I couldn't contained my voice and shouted at Mom.

"Out of all the people, Mom?" I asked her. Tears forming in my eyes as it blurs my vision. "You? You had to be the one that did me wrong?"

I could see her trying to not let her tears fall as well. She was just there standing wearing her usual tailored dress. She was a woman of class. Which you wouldn't suspect on orchestrating her son's abduction.

If I wasn't acting strong, I just know that I would be holding out streams of tears coming from me. I was so hurt learning all that happened by myself. No one even dared to tell me.

"I don't know—,"

"Oh, for God's sake, Mom." I calmed a bit, although still so mad at her. "I remember everything. Every last detail." A tear come falling.

She was quiet and still while I was sobbing, thinking and hurting about how could my own mom do that to me. "You were the one I only trusted."

"Axl, you need to understand—," her voice was suggesting but I couldn't possibly understand her then. I was so angry. I couldn't possibly accept any of her explanations.

"Just stop, Mom." I wiped my tears.

"Luke and I were in love." She just stared at me right after I said that. The funny thing was she was trying to act all shock when I knew already that she knew.