willing to be your knight (Knight Series, #2)

28: Calm

Axl

The sea was really calming to a point where I really didn't know how to explain how sooth I can get whenever I was near it. While inhaling the fresh sea breeze, I was quietly watching small waves crash to the sand. You know that feeling whenever you watch a movie ending with all that happy ending stuff? That's how I feel.

I suddenly heard a low moan accompanied with a subtle stretch of a bed. I rotated my sight and my eyes went directly to the girl who's quietly and, must I say, beautifully sleeping.

My face immediately became red just thinking about what happened last night. It was new and intense yet it was more beautiful than I have anticipated. I have dreamt of that moment. But, not quite like last night. I dreamt of that after the wedding.

Back then, I would always hung out with anyone who I can. Mostly because that the only way I get out of my reality. That was stupid of course. Fucking didn't do anything but I didn't know why I was craving for it back them, not to mention that I was only 17 when I did my first.

I don't like remembering that. It was a mistake. I know I should've never done that but I cannot escape the fact that I can never do anything about it anymore.

Then Valerie came. She made me feel love that requires nothing. No sex and all. Well, besides some heated kisses that would make me turned on every time, there were nothing beyond that.

I just sighed when I realized I broke my promise to my mom that I would always respect my partner. Is this some kind of insult to her?

But it seemed that she enjoyed it as much as I did. A big sigh, once again, exited my mouth. I should probably make up for the things I did.

I should take responsibility.

After I thought about all of the things I did, a doorbell sounded. I hurriedly went for the door, almost tiptoed to not create sound that would disturb Val's slumber.

After getting that thing. I made sure to ready myself.

I am many things but taking responsibility isn't me.

"Am I going to propose?" I stared myself at the mirror here in the bathroom of the villa that I rented for us to stay in. "Are you sure about this?" I asked myself, frowning.

It's not that I don't want to be with her forever, but this is kinda a big decision to make and we're both quite young. I'm 20 and she's just 19.

Nevertheless, engagement doesn't mean you need to be married as soon as possible.

I reached for my head and I massaged it softly. I have never been like this with a girl. Damn it.

I quietly opened the faucet and washed my face to think through over this.

After my self-dilemma in the bathroom I walked over the veranda and hid myself.

"Are you sure you want to marry her?" I heard Alexa making me grasped the ring box hardly.

"Yeah...I mean we did—,"

"Oh my god Axl!" She shouted in the other line that led me to making the phone at least 2 inches from my earlobe so that she don't get it bursted.

"Doing it doesn't mean anything." She sighed at me clearly knowing more about this matter. If she isn't my friend I would have never thought that she is one year younger. I totally consider her as an older sister.

"On the serious note Axl," I heard a pretty loud sigh making me anxious and clearly worried.

I kinda know where she's heading and I don't like it either.