100 STEPS TO HIS HEART

CHAPTER 34

"He experienced the greatest attack. Kapag sinusugod siya rito hindi naman ganoon, and to tell you the truth, I was not expecting na makaka-recover pa siya. ARVD is Arrythmogenic Right Ventricular Dysplasia. It's a rare form of heart disease in which the heart muscle of the right ventricle is replaced by fat or fibrous tissue. Dahil doon, ang ability ng puso or ng right ventricle na mag-pump ng blood ay sobrang hina. May abnormality sa right ventricle kasi ang heart muscle niya, nagiging fats. Patients with ARVD often have arrhythmias, or what you call abnormal heart rhythms, which can increase the risk of sudden cardiac arrest or death. It is usually diagnosed at a young age. Sa case ni Enzo, he had this when he was young. I think eight years old? This is a very rare disease because 1 out of 5,000 people lang ang nagkakaroon nito, and I'm very sorry na si Enzo pa ang nakakuha. It is often inherited, so I checked their family background. His father's brother died at a young age because of it," paliwanag ng doctor paglabas niya sa emergency room. "Sa case ni Enzo, kaya hindi siya pwedeng maging varsity player kasi hindi kaya ng puso niya at baka bigla siyang atakihin. Hindi rin pwede ang masyadong emotions. Masyadong masaya, masyadong malungkot. These past few months lagi siyang inaatake because of depression."

Lahat sila napatingin sa akin.

"There is no known curative treatment for ARVD."

Habang pinapaliwanag iyon ng doctor sa pinakamaiintindihan naming explanation, nag-break down na ako.

Tumakbo ako papalabas kasi hindi ko na kaya. Ayokong makita si Enzo na nakahiga sa loob at ayokong marinig ang tungkol sa sakit niya.

"I'm sorry," sabi ni Mico sabay yakap sa akin.

Noong sinabi niya 'yon, lalo akong umiyak.

"The hell with this thing, right? Of all the people, bakit si Gutierrez pa?"

Humarap ako sa kanya. Pinunasan ko ang luha niya.

"Kailan mo nalaman?" tanong ko sa kanya.

"When we talked... during Valentine's Ball. He was with me. Sumunod si Venice, Bryle, Chelsea, at Miks." Then he sighed.

Nagsimulang magkuwento si Mico. Kaya pala parang may tinatagong kaba ang mga mata noon ni Chelsea nang magkuwento rin siya.

"When Bryle and Venice intervened, Enzo and I momentarily stopped fighting. Venice asked why he was doing what he was doing to you and she pleaded for him to stop meddling in our relationship. Then Enzo started to apologize. He said he was sorry for hurting you."

"But suddenly looked frantic. Hindi niya raw alam ang gagawin niya. He said he was confused, scared, in pain, and... he literally can't breathe. He said he didn't want to hurt any of us. When Venice asked him what was wrong, that was when he dropped the news to us. That he has ARVD."

Iniwasan ko siya ng tingin. Even hearing about Enzo's sickness from someone else, especially Mico, made my heart heavy.

"I could still remember everyone's faces when he said that. Si Venice nakatayo lang doon, nakahawak sa bibig niya, pinipigilan ang malakas niyang iyak. Sina Chelsea at Miks naman, gulat na gulat sa sinabi niya. Hindi ko na rin napigilan ang sarili ko noon kaya sinigawan ko siya. Gusto kong bawiin niya ang mga sinabi niya kung nagsisinungaling lang siya. Akala ko kasi sinabi niya lang yon dahil gusto niyang bawiin ka. It made me hurt, that revelation of his. But he was saying his truth. I couldn't bear it."

"He could only say he was sorry. That he was just too afraid. Hindi rin daw niya kasi tanggap ang sakit niya before. He was in denial. And at that moment, he can't fight it. That he just had to accept it kasi lumalala na."

"Then he started saying his apologies again. He even apologized to me personally. But that night, I couldn't look him in the eyes. I just couldn't believe that all of it was true." Napatigil siya, at tumingin sa akin. "Ikaw? Ngayon mo lang ba nalaman?" He looked so concerned.

"Kanina lang. Kababasa ko lang ng sulat ni Eula."

"Eula? Enzo's ex? What did she say?"

"In-explain niya lahat," tapos inabot ko kay Mico ang sulat.

"I don't know what to feel. When he told me he's sick, all I wanted to do was ask God why him? He's like a brother to me," sabi ni Mico. "You still love him right?" bigla niyang tanong. "When he told me that he's sick, nalungkot ako sa dalawang bagay. Una, dahil sa baka mawala siya sa akin, pangalawa dahil sa baka mawala ka sa akin," hirap na hirap na sabi ni Mico.

Napatungo siya habang ang dalawang kamay niya ay nakatakip sa buong mukha niya. "Ang hirap, Hope. Ang hirap i-give up ka sa kanya, pero kailangan kasi nagparaya siya sa akin para sa'yo." Tumingin siya sa akin at tinanong ako, "Mahal mo pa ba si Enzo?"

Hindi ako nakasagot kaagad. "Oo. Mahal ko pa rin siya."

Napahawak na naman siya sa mukha niya.

"Nahihirapan ako, Mico. Kailangan niya ako pero ayokong masaktan ka. Anong gagawin ko?" hirap na hirap kong sagot kay Mico.

"Hindi ko rin kayang ipagdamot ka ngayong alam ko nang may sakit siya. Hindi lang dahil sa naawa ako sa kanya. Hindi tayo magiging masaya pareho kung gagawin natin 'yon. Sinabi sa akin ni Enzo, hihiramin ka raw niya. Galit na galit ako sa kanya kasi parang sumusuko na siya sa buhay niya! Ang kailangan ko, mabuhay siya. Pero kung kailangan i-give up kita para sa buhay niya, gagawin ko. Handa akong masaktan para sa kanya kasi kapatid ko siya..."

Niyakap ko siya. Ano na nga ba ang gagawin namin? Paano na nga ba?