In The Shadows

8

CHAY

The following day, I woke up with all the sunlight shining brightly through the windows. I felt my arms wrapped around something. The previous night floods my brain, and I smile. Snuggling closer to Kim's chest and taking in a deep breath. I look up at Kim, and he moves underneath me. I shut my eyes in case he woke up to me staring.

"Why are you pretending to be asleep." He says. Damit, I still got caught, so I smiled with a laugh. "Well, I'm scared," I feel Kim rub my shoulder, giving me the courage to continue speaking. "That, if I look at you. I'll cry." I say, and I feel him face me. "Why is that?" He asked. I take in another deep breath and tighten my hold on him.

"I've always felt like an unlucky person, but today, I've realized that all my luck was being saved so I can be here with you," I say, holding him even tighter. I feel his heart pick up. "Pii Kim.." I say, and he looks me into my eyes. "I love you." I just told Kim I loved him. He kept on staring at me emotionless. I wonder If I stepped over the line. Yesterday, I just told him I liked him; today, I told him I love him. But the thought went away just as fast. I laugh off the silence. "Do you love me? I asked. He again stayed silent, looking into my eyes. I knew it was to soon to say but with last night, and what happened. I couldn't stop myself from falling in love with him. He upset me but went through the trouble of going to Wuju just to make it up. He also tried talking to me through the door when I was crying. Is those not an act of love?

Kim lets out a heavy breath, and I feel his hand move from my shoulder to my head to pat it. "I.." he says, and I smile. "I'm hungry...Let's find something to eat." He says. He didn't say it back. What do I think now..." mmm. okay.." That is all I can think about saying right now. He moves his hand from me and stretches out. "Then I'll make you some fried eggs," I say, and I get up from the couch, removing my blanket. He doesn't love me? Was I wrong in thinking that last night and all he did... But he even explained to me why he left. I look at my hand. My face went hot. He showed me that he reacted to me the way I reacted to him. Does he love me, or does he just want to sleep with me?

I walked down the steps in a daze. Kim is with me. That is all that matters. My simple crush was no longer, and we are together now. If he wanted to sleep with me, we would have done it last night. I remember how he kissed my neck and pushed me to my bed. I was willing to give myself to him, but it was a trick so he could see what I was hiding. I laughed it off, but I felt he was using himself against me so he could get what he wanted. What he told me in the studio replayed in my head. 'Before I got to know anything about you.' The way he said it sounded off. Let's not think about that right now. Kim said he was hungry I wanna make him breakfest.

I got to the kitchen and opened the fridge. I don't have many eggs left. I reached for my phone but remembered it was in my bedroom. I wanted to see how much of my allowance was left. I should be getting my allowance from Hia soon. I can spare these eggs and more later. I made a note to pick some up at the market. Then, I went to the rice cooker to make some rice to go with the eggs. I stood there while that got started. Did I imagine it all? The same feeling? The touching? The kiss? Does he have the same feeling? Or did he do all that because he didn't want to be rude? I reach for my lips. The kisses felt so real, though. I sigh and shake my head, dropping my hand. I cracked the eggs into the pan, trying not to think about anything.

I added a little bit of salt and pepper. I was trying my hardest not to burn them. Pii was the one who usually cooked. His eggs always came out perfect. When I cooked for myself, they usually got burned or came out runny. But since I have been living alone for a few months now, I have gotten better. I hope my brother has been doing okay. I haven't heard from him in so long. I sigh again, taking a plate out. I heard Kim walking down the steps. He stayed in my bed last night. I couldn't help but smile. The cooker was done with the rice, so I scooped some onto the plate and put the eggs on top. Surprisingly, they were not burned. I put a smiley face on top. Making me smile. Kim was already at the table when I got done, I brought the plate towards him. He placed my phone on the table. "I saw that you left it, so I brought it down for you," he says. If only I had it a moment ago. "Thank you," I say