~S~
"Go get 'em, baby." Lark was bent down to be level with Ruth, big smiles on both their sweet little faces as they watched us come off stage. "Go slow." She let out a soft giggle as she held out her hands, silently hoping the baby wouldn't lose balance.
She was a wobbly runner with her little ballet flats, headphones covering her ears, a stuffed bunny that her grandpa had got her in her arms and the most perfect giggles filling the air around us.
"There she is." Lindsey let go of my hand the second we hit the bottom step, dropping down to scoop her up the second he could.
My heart burst the moment she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, head meeting his chest to be carried. "Let's get these off, huh?" I kept one hand on Lindsey's arm as I used the other to gently pull those earphones off her head. "That's better, huh?" I gasped lightly, seeing her eyes light up as another big smile trailed across her face.
Ruth had really captured my heart from the moment she had entered this wild world. She was the greatest thing... she still is the greatest thing.
Lindsey let out a soft laugh, staring down at her for a second before he glanced over at me. "Are you a grandmas girl?" He wondered as he slowly slipped a free hand around my waist to guide the way down the hallway.
I tossed my head back, letting out a soft laugh as we headed for the dressing rooms with Lark and Karen leading us.
That moment, along with many others seemed to just totally transport me back in time... it was a very serious déjà vu feeling, but that was probably because we had done it before.
We had been there- Lindsey and I, carrying around a tiny baby backstage, while we tried our very best to get along. We had already done it and we would do it again for the sake of our kids... We had to.
"I heard that miss Karen picked up some special treats for our sweet baby..." I spoke to her in an enthusiastic tone of voice as I playfully tickled her side to get more of those contagious giggles to echo down the hall.
With a soft squeal, Ruth clapped her hands together, so excited, which made her grandpa and I, both chuckle in return.
"Too cute." Lindsey lightly patted my hip when we got to the door at the end, telling me to head in first.
My dressing room was usually the hang out spot, even when I was trying to get ready for a show, I could almost always count on at least five extra people hanging out, so I was little surprised when it was just Lark, Karen, Lindsey, Ruth and I... surprised but happy.
In all honesty, I had been craving some time with them, together... We didn't get that opportunity anymore, not when Lindsey had a family and Lark was so far away.
It was always so hectic, so to have a moment of calm was always nice.
"Tell grandpa to get you a cupcake." I motioned towards the coffee table in the corner, where there were snacks and drinks sitting out.
"Okay, boss." He teased lightly, a soft wink following his words as they headed in the other direction. "What kind of cupcake do you want?" Lindsey chatted with her the entire way over there and the way she was babbling back, you would have thought that they were having a serious conversation.
He had always been a good dad, but there was something incredibly sweet that came with witnessing him as a grandpa... He was the best and I think, by then, I was no longer blinded by the arguments, the emotions, the work, so I noticed it a little more and appreciated it a lot.
I smiled softly as I found myself in front of the vanity mirror, staring at them through the glass as I worked on getting my earrings out and taking my rings off.
I used to wish that we could be together, like a real family, but that had never been the case and for a long time, I thought it never would.
"Gramma!" The second Ruth's two feet met the floor, she came running my way with a cupcake in each hand and blue eyes lit up. "Gramma!" She didn't know how to say much quite yet, but with all our phone calls, she did pick up on that fairly early.
"We picked out a purple one for you, grandma." Lindsey was trailing behind, already pulling off the paper of his cupcake as he headed for the leather couch to take a seat.
"Oh, thank you so much, Angel." I bent down to take it, pushing some of her blonde curls back behind her ear in the process. "Let's go sit." I stood back up, smiling lightly when she laced her fingers in mine to follow me to the sofa.
Lindsey held out his hands to help her up, while I curled in right next to him with a throw blanket in one hand and the stuffed bunny that Ruth gave me to hold on to in the other.
"Oh my goodness." Lark teased lightly when she headed our way, eyes playfully wide as she looked at the baby, who had pink frosting every where.
"She's funny." Lindsey nodded his head softly and I could tell that he was getting ready to change the topic of conversation already... He had things he wanted to talk about, especially since he hadn't seen her in months and their phone calls were far and few between. "How have things been going? How's Austin? How's work?" He said that all at once, obviously a little upset that he wasn't in the loop of her life anymore.
But you have to understand, at that time, things had gotten complicated again. Lark was really busy with her life out East, and so was Lindsey, who had a wife that was incredibly ill all the time and two young kids that required a lot of his attention.
He didn't have time to sit around and chat on the phone every night, not like I did.
"It's been crazy, dad." She admitted as she casually sat down in the chair next to him. "I've been working in the ER six nights a week and am raising a baby, all by myself during the day..." Lark wasn't being mean or complaining- she was being blunt and honest.
It wasn't easy- it's not for any parent, but she had it rough, mainly because she had absolutely no one out there to help her, besides Austin... and he worked a lot back then.
"You're doing so well." I always complimented her when I got the chance and not only because I was proud, but because I believed it, too.
I thought that she was just absolutely incredible at what she was doing in this life.
"You are." He agreed, nodding lightly as he glanced back down at Ruth, who was snuggled into his arms.
"Thanks." Lark let out a soft chuckle, eyes burning into her glass of wine for a moment. "I actually have a huge favor to ask you..." the tone in her voice was enough to let me know that she'd grown anxious.
"Whatever you need." I didn't hesitate to reply.
She paused for a second, making sure we were both listening before she began. "I have to switch to days in a few months and it's been so difficult finding a nanny..." she lingered, shifting awkwardly in her chair. "I don't trust anyone and I just need some help with Ruth until I can figure something else out." She added. "I've thought about this a lot, and I was wondering, maybe, when you get home from this leg of the tour, she could come stay with you two for a little while...?" She had tears in her eyes and I knew it wasn't easy for her, but she wanted what was best for her daughter, which is something I can understand well.
"Of course, we can." Lindsey was the first to agree, a big smile dancing across his face.
With a light nod, I bit down on the inside of my cheek. "We'll make it work."
