Perfumed Secrets | Kurt Cobain

Looking into his eyes I think he's already hurt

Faye found it difficult to fall asleep as soon as Kurt entered the room, holding back her tears and practically holding her breath as well. But soon enough, due to the alcohol she had earlier, she dozed off. Despite her initial deep slumber, she woke up several times throughout the night. First, due to the noise emanating from downstairs. Then, she found herself feeling too cold, despite the presence of three massive blankets on the mattress. Each time she woke up she noticed that Kurt seemed completely knocked out.

On one occasion when she woke up shivering from the cold, she decided to step outside for a smoke. By then, most of the other partygoers had either left or found a place to crash, scattered around on sofas or in corners. As she stood outside, she took a moment to admire the night sky, its beauty temporarily easing her troubled mind.

Returning to the room, she found Kurt still in the same position as before. Quietly making her way back to the bed, she remained on the edge, but longing to snuggle up to him for warmth and comfort. But more than that, she yearned for his touch, feeling a few tears escape her eyes as she closed them.

Then Kurt approached her, still asleep. He didn't reach out to touch her, but his body drew closer to hers. Frozen in place, Faye silently prayed for the night to be over soon, hoping for some semblance of peace and clarity to come with the dawn.

She woke up as the first light of dawn began to filter through the windows. Though she hadn't gotten as much rest as she needed, she was grateful for the bit of sleep she managed to snatch. Pulling on her coat, she tiptoed outside, careful not to disturb the others who were still asleep. The evidence of the previous night's revelry was scattered all around her, with empty bottles and cans littering the floor.

As the chilly morning air greeted her she couldn't help but marvel at the sight of the sunrise on the horizon. Despite her exhaustion, she reached for her pack of cigarettes, knowing it wasn't the healthiest choice to smoke first thing in the morning but she was feeling the need to clear her head. Tonight had been strange, and she was unsure how to broach the subject with Kurt. She didn't want to come across as demanding or confrontational, but she couldn't shake the feeling of unease. Perhaps she was overthinking things, she mused to herself.

Taking a moment to explore her surroundings, she wandered down to the lake, where she sat and watched as the sun began to climb higher into the sky. Amidst her confusion and uncertainty, she found herself captivated by the beauty of the natural world around her, momentarily forgetting her worries as she immersed in the tranquility of the dawn.

When she stepped back into the house, the comforting aroma of freshly brewed coffee met her senses. Without hesitation, she made her way towards the source, relieved to find Shelli already at the kitchen.

"Hey," she greeted softly, mindful not to disturb Shelli too much as she seemed half-asleep.

"Oh, hi, Faye," she replied with a yawn, still in a bit of a daze.

"I'm sorry, did I wake you?" Faye asked, remembering that they were all sleeping in the attic together.

Shelli shook her head. "Oh no, I didn't even notice you were up," she poured coffee for both of them. "We're actually leaving earlier than expected. I got offered some extra work today, and the money was too good to pass up."

"That's great," Faye replied, but she noticed a hint of confusion in Shelli's expression.

"I thought you might be upset about leaving so early."

Faye hesitated for a moment, realizing she might have been more honest than she intended. "Oh, it's nothing like that," she quickly reassured. "I'm just feeling pretty tired, so I thought I could use some rest before heading back to Seattle."