In My Opinion

Forever for You by dwarkaratna

Title: Forever for you by dwarkaratna
Source: ELGANZA, INC. | AWARDS by TheCieloCommunity
Category: Comedy

Mature: N (blood, bullying, death, guns, loss of a loved one, medical issues, mild profanity, murder, PTSD, sexual assault, sexual references, violence)
Status: Complete
LGBTQIAP+: N

Special note (judging): I had four books in this category, and the other judge (YsmeriaGuilro) had four books.
Result: 71/100

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*****

Rubric:
- Title: 5
- Book cover: 5
- Description (blurb): 5
- Plot & storytelling: 15
- Character development: 10
- Writing style: 10
- Grammar: 10
- Originality & creativity: 10
- Emotional impact: 10
- Pacing & structure: 5
- Accuracy (if non-fiction): 5
- Overall enjoyment & engagement: 10
Total: 100

*****

Total: 71/100

Title: 4/5
I prefer capitalization in titles (Forever for You) so that's my only nitpicky complaint here. Otherwise, it's a cute, romantic title.

Cover: 3/5
I like the color theme and the imagery, and the font style, size, color, and placement of the title and subtitle, but I'd change the wording of the subtitle. The phrase is actually "push and pull," so I'd just swap that for "pulls and pushes." Also, the plain black text for your name feels out of place to me on this cover. I'm not sure you need to change the font style, but changing the color to something that works better with the tan color scheme would probably help.

Blurb: 2/5
As with Parth Probodhika, there are a lot of issues with awkward phrasing and grammatical mistakes, I'm guessing from a language barrier. I probably won't go into much detail in the grammar section for the actual story, but since this is a smaller chunk of text to work with, I'll go over what I'm seeing here and make some suggestions. (Note: The following is my first impression before reading the story. Addendum at the bottom.)

First, in the quote, you don't need "much" before "powerful," and there should be an article (the) before "right time." Since this is a quote and not dialogue leading into a dialogue tag, it needs an ending punctuation mark (period, exclamation mark, or question mark). Commas can't end sentences. In this case, the ending punctuation mark should be a period.

In the second paragraph, you can condense the wording a lot to be more concise and make the meaning clearer by changing "who was a reporter in profession" to "a reporter." Just offset that phrase with commas before and after (Trisha, a reporter,). I don't think the words "the last" work very well here, because unless her life is perfectly happy after this tragedy (or the tragedy kills her*), it's not the last one she'll ever face. And, judging by the rest of the blurb, there is more tragedy to come (and she's definitely still alive*). So, I'd cut "the last and." Then, I'd change "mafia" to "mafioso," because that is the word for a member of the mafia, which is an organization, not a person. Also, there should be a comma after mafia/mafioso, and both names need capitalization (Dikarsh Singh). There should be another comma after "that," and I think the preposition "of" would work better than "from."

There's a big gap in information between the second sentence and the third sentence about her being an aimless wanderer. The sentence about her not backing out of her mission makes it sound like she's still a reporter and still pursuing a lead, even after whatever tragedy occurred, and that is not wandering aimlessly. The last sentence makes it sound like the tragedy made her lose her drive and her way (and possibly her job, but that's just my interpretation), so how did she get from being a reporter who wouldn't back down to being an aimless wanderer?