Chairman: Dear Director.
Fade in to the inside of a tunnel that leads out to South's corpse.
Chairman: Your program was granted the use of a single artificial intelligence unit, for implantation experiments. Yet, the department records clearly show multiple agents in the field with implants, during the same timeframes. Surely this must be a logging error, and we anticipate a corrected document soon.
Church: Okay. I have a great idea. Let's all put down our guns, and not shoot anyone else that we're trying to help.
Washington: Relax.
Church: Exactly. Let's all relax.
Washington: Agent South had already shot me in the back once before, and she tried to give up Delta to the enemy. I wasn't going to wait around to see if she decided to do it again.
Church: Right, okay, sure...
Washington: Stop talking to me like that.
Church: We're not talking to you like anything.
Caboose: No one is talking to you like this...
Rayner: Okay, cut it out guys.
Washington: You don't need to treat me like that. I'm not crazy, okay? I'm totally completely sane. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go blow up this dead body.
Church: Hey, hey uh, uh, green guy.
Caboose: I'm blue.
Rayner: He means Delta, Caboose.
Caboose: Oh, him.
Delta: Hello. How may I be of assistance?
Church: Hey yeah, uh, what's the deal with this guy?
In the background, Wash shoots the body with a battle rifle.
Delta: Destruction of unused armor or equipment is standard recovery procedure.
Church: Yeah, no, I mean is he like a whack-job or what?
Rayner: Church…
Church: What? It’s a valid question!
Wash tosses a plasma grenade at the body, and it blows up.
Delta: Are you aware of his experience with Epsilon?
Church: Epsilon, oh, you mean his A.I.?
Wash now has a flamethrower, and Souths corpse is completely engulfed in flames.
Delta: Correct. Epsilon was an... unstable intelligence unit that had to be deleted. Its integration with Washington's mind concerned our superiors.
Wash tries piling fusion cores and gas tanks onto the corpse.
Church: What do you think?
Delta: I believe that Agent Washington's sanity is well within acceptable deviations, for now.
Church: Wow, what a ringing endorsement.
Rayner: Look, after everything he’s been through it may be a little hard for him to trust those around him, but he’s not a bad guy. He’s not just gonna kill us.
Church: Maybe not now, but what about later, huh?
Rayner: He won’t turn on us, at least, not without reason.
YOU ARE READING
Red vs Blue : Mirage
HumorFormer mercenary Kyle Rayner has lived a rough life. After retiring from mercenary work he sought to live a normal life, but soon learns how hard it is to adjust to civilian life after all the grueling missions he's been on. So, he does the next bes...
