Summer

Loophole

Is it true that we find things when we least expect it? Like the way love shows up in the most unexpected places, tearing us open to as they begin to plant the seeds, that grow and tangle around every crevice until there's nothing but them? And you didn't even understand the full magnitude of it until one day you woke up and the sight of their face made everything feel better. As if the nightmares you had didn't mean nothing if you had them. It was feeling every thought fly out the window as they held you close.

It was currently early morning and Ace was sleeping next to me like he did most nights these days. My heart felt like it was going to climb of my chest just from the sight of him. I had to wonder, would I ever stop loving him the way I did? Or would it feel like this forever? I didn't know the first thing about love, but I knew the way I felt about him felt otherworldly. No one could do to me what he did.

Ever since the incident, we had secretly been offically together. Which for confusing for the both of us as we tried to figure it out what that meant. I had never been with anyone that way. And neither had he. We were trying to work it out step by step, so I suggested taking it back to the beginning. But Ace refused, saying that the summer we had together was apart of our history and that he never wanted us to forget that.

We went back to the restaurant that he took me before a few times. Took weekend rides on his bike to see Ken and even go back to New York. It was crazy having sex in the bed where we first met. I was originally against it, but Ace told me that the first night we met had he had thought I was an angel sent to him and I folded. I was so embarassed the next day but Ken didn't say anything even though I knew he probably heard us. I was happier than I could ever remember in my life.

I didn't want this to end.

Ace stirred and I quickly turned and closed my eyes so he wouldn't think I was awake. He worried about me not being able to sleep, but I did sleep. When he was here at least. Other times I was still having trouble because of everything that happened. I felt him lean over, brush my hair away from my exposed shoulder so he could plant soft kisses there. I couldn't help but smile and I knew he caught it. I just couldn't help it when it came to him.

"Summer, you know you can't lie to me." He planted more kisses on my bare skin and I bit my lip to stop myself from sighing. "It doesn't work."

I felt his fingers run over the base of my spine, which made me tense. The marks she had made on me were still healing. I hated that he had to see them, that some of them might not even go away. But Ace didn't stop as he pressed his bare body against mine, turning me around so I was facing him. We were both fully awake now. I was no longer pretending.

"I could fucking kill her." Ace spoke harshly. "I can't believe she's out there somewhere, if I fucking find h-"

I kissed him softly and deliberately to get him to stop. It was the last thing I wanted to hear. That the girl who had taunted and hurt me was out there free and roaming. All I wanted was to be  with the guy I loved. Not to think about the people who wanted to torment me. So I ran my hands over his sculpted back and pulled him on top of me. My legs wrapped around him as he moved back to kiss down my body.

Having sex with someone I loved and trusted was a new experience for me. Most people thought of me as a person who gave it all away, but in reality I couldn't give anything to anyone unless I cared deeply about them. And since I couldn't get myself to ever open up, that only included two people. I was sheltered soul who had hidden herself away so she couldn't really, truly get hurt by anyone. That was why it was surprising that I had started it this time. I couldn't do that before.

Ace could see that I was scared and broken. That was why he healed me with every kiss, took away every touch I never wanted. I could lose myself in him a million times over and it would never be enough. I could see myself with him forever, our future in my head that I had planned out. When I thought of life without him, it felt empty and vast.