Even Heroes Have Scars

[44] Thinking Out Loud

Ansley's P.O.V.

The week passed by with small visits from Hayden and rehearsals from eight until twelve or later. Today was the big day. Today was Saturday, the day I had to perform in front of at least one hundred people.

I had texted the information to Demi and she asked if she could invite Marissa, which I agreed to. I hadn't seen Marissa since Demi's birthday, so it would be great to see her again.

I didn't want to bother Drew and Ms. Patrick about keeping Jacob, and he wanted to go the performance, so I brought him with me, even though he would be spending the night at Drew's when we got home.

Chelsea had us all meet up at the music store at eleven in the morning to do one last rehearsal, which lasted an hour. Jacob hung around with Stewart while we rehearsed. From twelve until one, we just hung around eating lunch, which I ate a bite or two of. I didn't keep down what I ate Tuesday or Thursday, but I kept down the two bites of sandwich I had for lunch today and the dinners I made the rest of the week for Jacob and I. I noticed he had been eating some of the dinners I made him, but he didn't finish more than half of it, which was still heartbreaking.

"Okay, I think it's time to load up," Chelsea clapped her hands together and motioned her hands toward the door.

It was three o'clock. We had been rehearsing for the past two hours, after lunch, totaling in three hours today. My fingers could have bled if we rehearsed one more time.

I'd already been dressed in the clothes I was performing in: dark skinny jeans, a tight gray shirt that, in black, had an outline of Texas, and in white letters, read the word: HOME, a black jacket over it with sleeves that went to my elbows, and black sandals that were like flip-flops. Jacob had suggested I wear jewelry, and, trying to keep on his good side, I allowed him to choose the jewelry I would wear. He chose a long silver necklace with a cross on it, matching earrings, and two rings: one was another matching cross and the other one was a ring that looked like it had an equal sign. He said that the crosses were for God and with courage of good luck in Christ, and the equal sign was for equality, seeing as how I was gay as fuck. Whoops.

"You guys need to be careful with the instruments," Stewart instructed from the doorway. "Hey, Ansley. Can I talk to you for a second?"

I snapped the guitar case shut and pushed myself to my feet, following Stewart out of the room and into the main part of the store where a few people were looking around.

"That guitar has been up for sale for years, as you know..." he started.

My heart suddenly began to pound. Was he selling it? Oh fuck. I loved that guitar. It felt like it was mine. I had tested out seventeen different guitars and that was the one I liked best, so that was the one Stewart always let me use! How could he sell it?

"I finally found someone I want to sell it to. If I don't sell it today, I have to send it to another store for used instruments. It isn't a safe place for that poor guitar," he sighed.

"Y-you're selling it? So I can't take it tonight? That's the only guitar I've used from here. I've used it for two years," my eyes were getting a little teary.

"Because it has been for sale for so long, the price has gone down to one hundred sixty dollars," he explained, drumming his fingers on the counter.

"You're selling it for a low price like that? It's worth so much more!" I insisted, not believing him.

"Ansley," he chuckled. "The guitar is yours if you want it. You're the one I want to sell it to. You've played that guitar for years and you've been the only one to get the use out of it."