four words [the fangirl ii - a.i]

27

S A R A H

"Really? Right here, you're gonna end up with that?" He was angry about a stupid little thing.

We were at the backstage, preparing for themselves to play. American tour has started. Then right here, he was holding his drum sticks, which when he was supposed to be out before the other boys but this time Michael went out first.

He mentioned about Derek Discanio, STATE CHAMPS' frontman, calling me 'hey beautiful' . There were others I've met on earth who called me beautiful; his mother, his brother, his auntie, his family and Ace and Samantha. "And now he's already sending you this photos about best friends hanging out in a forest this summer. Isn't he aware that..." he stopped short. He must have thought about our privacy. He didn't want anyone to know about the proposal besides the circle of his family.

My parents didn't even know.

"Did you ever see any response?" I asked.

"Ashton, you should go out. I want to go out." Luke said. I assume, by his tone, he doesn't care about us anymore. And I was kind of glad he did that because if he didn't he wouldn't go out. "You're supposed to talk about this after the show. Don't screw your vibes." Luke continued and go.

Ashton did too.

I heard the crowd as Luke talk to them. Isn't it funny? How all of these band members talk to the fans? They would ask how are we and we, the fangirls and fanboys, would respond in screams. And with that they would understand which I still haven't figured out how they could understand.

I was walking through the hallway heading back to their room. I wanted to watch them by the side of the stage but I kept distracting Ashton. He would look at my way and make a straight face then he probably will screw everything up because of me. So, I walked away.

At half I heard that the drums stopped, then the bass. Every beat dropped but the screaming fans wouldn't stop.

"Alright. I'm sorry. I got out of the beat. Let's start over again." he said. See? Even out of sight, he would be distracted. They just started.

I went out for food and done nothing. I wanted for a walk but it was America. I didn't know places. I didn't want to be a problem.

I went back.

"Oh hey, hi," there are just some worst days and everything won't work out like it used to, "Where have you been?" It was Derek, and behind him was Irwin. "I've been looking for you."

Five steps away but everything felt like fast forward. Ashton was coming and I didn't know what I would respond to Derek. Or should I talk to him? Let my guard down.

He passed right at me without looking. No emotion, nothing. Like he did not see me, "Why you were looking for me?" I asked Derek back. It might be important.

"I wanted to show you something." He said cheerfully.

"Ashton?" Luke asked when he saw me, "where is he heading?"

"Straight up. He didn't talk to me."

In a snap he already had my arm, "Sorry, I have to take this girl somewhere else but here." With that Luke Hemmings caught me right handed and walk through the room. "From you."

"Really? Luke Hemmings? Do you really have to say that? You could hurt him." I said as we gained distance from Derek.

"I prefer to see him hurt than my bestfriend. Bluntly, you should've told him from the start." He said, we took left and he was still holding my arm, "Because you know what? Either way, Ashton might have thought you like him and Derek would be the bad one which clearly is you or he likes you. Which is obviously a fact."

We reached the room. Crossed arms I said, "What did I do?"

"What you are doing is not right." Michael said.

So this is what it feels like when your guy has a squad? "He wanted privacy, you too. Especially Hemmings so I did not mention anything. So, its me? You think I was flirting with Derek?"

"Might be." Calum said flatly.

I was about to reach for my bag but, "Don't move. Silent Ashton was never good." Calum said as he stopped me from taking it. Warning me, "He could be the meanest person in the world. He would literally shout at things that moves. Don't chase after him. Let him be."

"I don't care if he'd kill me let me talk to him. Let it go Hood." I was referring to my bag.

A S H T O N

I was never really mad. I knew she would never cheat. Maybe I was just afraid that one day she would want to cheat because, who knows, there are others.

     More handsome.

     More effort. (A lot, like Derek)

     Sweeter.

     Better.

Who would want that?