Wanting to be loved (Zuko)

22.

I didn't see Zuko that night. I sat in my room looking out of the window when I heard a door close and I walked out if I was really careful I could walk with my knee but not for too long. I went over to Zuko's room and see if he was back. When I opened the door he just took his shirt of and he was thinking about something because he noticed I was there when I closed the door. 

He turned around fast and was ready to attack but when he saw that it was me he turned to his bed. 'Please go away I want to be alone' he said and laid on his bed. I walked over and sat beside him. 'You were with Aang tonight weren't you?' I stated and he only looked at me. 'How do you know?' he said after a minute of silence and I shrugged 'I just know. I had a feeling he was in trouble and you were gone for the whole night. Did you get him into trouble' Iasked a little angry. Don't get me wrong I was trying to understand Zuko but I couldn't agree with him hunting down a friend of mine.

'No! I got him out! Zhao had him and I busted him out' he said. That had me surprised. 'Really? But if you had him why isn't he with you then?' I asked him and Zuko explained what happened. When he was finished I gave him a hug. But because he was laying downI resulted in me laying on top of him.

'If I get a treatment like this I have to save him more often' he joked. And I got back up 'Thank you for saving him'I said with a big smile. 'Do you think he and I could be friends?' he suddenly asked and I gave him a questioned look 'He said if we met before the war we maybe could've been friends' he explained. 'I don't know. Maybe if you stop trying to capture him and stop attacking his friends' I said. 'I captured you multiple times and you are kinder to me now then the first time' he smiled 'That's right but you didn't captured me this time, I came to you' I explained.

'Oh so you did miss me' and he laughed. 'I think I like you better when you threaten me' I said and sighed it did sounded wrong when I said it. 'Really because then we can't do this anymore' and he pulled my face to his and again I laid on top of him. 'Hmmm yeah that's the only reason this is better I guess' I said and kissed his lips. We just kissed for a little while and I sat up again and Zuko laid his head on my lap and holding my waist.

'Now you know you're friends are close will you escape now?' he asked and had his eyes closed. 'I would like to see them again but I can't escape because of my knee and you're holding me so I can't run away' I said to him and he looked up to me and smiled then he closed his eyes again. After a little while I heard his steady breath and I knew he was asleep. I stayed in my position for some time when the door opened and I looked up from watching Zuko sleep, he was so peaceful and calm. Iroh stood in the door opening 'I was looking for you' he whispered and smiled at Zuko 'I will let him sleep' and he waved at me and closed the door again. I laid my hand on Zuko's head.

I think he will look kinder if he didn't shave his head. I think he woke up from my touch because he grabbed my hand and sat up.'Do want to move our talk from yesterday to now?' Zuko asked 'Yeah we could do that' and I sat with my back against the wall and Zuko moved to sit next tome. 'Where do we begin?' I ask him 'Uhm talk about our parents?' he asked me and I smiled 'Then I finished already, I don't know my parents. They dropped me off at the South Pole when I was a baby' I answered 'Maybe if my parents did that with me I turned out different. So my father is the Fire Lord as you know and the younger brother of my uncle. My mother disappeared a few years ago and I never found out why my father hates meand gave me this scar and banished me from the Fire Nation. The only way I can go back and restore my honor is by bringing him the Avatar' Zuko explained.

'I think your mother left for a good reason. No mother would abandon her children without a really reason' I say to him and take his hand. 'Is that something you tell yourself to make it hurt less?!' he said and held my hand tight 'No I know that my mother left me because she had me with a man from another nation and it was too dangerous' I said while looking in his eyes. 'How do you know that for sure' 'Katara's grandmother told me, she took me in when my mother brought me to her. She said that my mother hoped to one day come and take me with her. She would risk her own safety to bring me there. And being a woman myself, I can't imagine to lose my children I rather make sure they are safe and I can't imagine the pain to leave your child'.

'You want children?' he then asks. 'Yeah I would love to have children of my own. I always looked out for the children at the tribe. I can't wait to settle' I smiled dreamily. 'I think you will be a very good mother' he said and I gave him a big smile it felt good to hear that. 

'And you? Do you want children?' 'I don't know, I'm scared I won't be a good father to them since I didn't have a good father figure but besides that I think it would be wonderful to see something you made with the person you love' he said with a little smile 'You do have a good father figure. Your uncle. I think Iroh sees you as his own son. And because of what your own father did you know what you absolutely shouldn't do' and I smiled at him 'I think you can become a great father Zuko.' after I said that he just stared at me for acouple of minutes I think this is the first time he talked to someone about this and the first time anyone said that he could be a good father. Then his lips were on mine and he took me by my waist and pulled me on his lap without breaking the kiss. 

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- xo Calypso.