Inglorious Impostor Presents: The Astonisher's Return

The Journey of Distance

Previously, on Inglorious Imposteur:

Recap 1: Back at the private estate of the dynamic duo, fueled by both political power and greed ( often a close association)...

 Oil Rig: "2 guys in a row, that's us, lets do this."  [what originally was supposed to be the night of 'the ultimate score,' the Federal Reserve heist had to be put to an unexpected pause]

Rob ( exclaiming): "Rig, get off the pipe! The freaking IRS man, oh they're on our backs now! We're screwed! I just got a federal notice saying that they're going to start auditing us! I'm not sure why but I do remember buying some stuff. Anyway, they're going to penalize us with even more debt!"

Oil Rig: "Crap! Are you serious? Now they're going to be snooping around here asking where we got the money from! Plus, we don't have enough to pay! Rob, take a deep breath. Can you tell me exactly what provoked a government agency, like the IRS, to be breathing down our necks like this? In other words... What the hell did you buy?

Rob ( recalling): "Well... there was the 'Cum on in Casino.' Let's see here [muttering to himself], Titty Whiskey Deluxe...objectifying women at the casino by participating in their offering of an illegal exchange of sex... slot machines... oh yeah! A one-on-one session with a stripper, who I paid with cash taped onto my body..."

Oil Rig: You're kidding me, right?! First of all, this isn't a time for comic relief. Second, wads of cash stuck onto your body like some loon? Of course, such extravagant transactions will obviously result in some black ties. Its no wonder why we're so criminalized. Can't blame you on this type of idiotic behavior though, considering what you were on. Rob, you SOB, you dug us in this hole and you're pulling us out of this mess one way or another.  A/N: That in no way was a sexual joke; by my mentioning of this, it puts the thought into your head.

Rob: *deep sigh* Its obvious that we have to launder our remaining money, and like you said before, it isn't that much. The question is, what business is inconspicuous enough for the IRS to avoid as a result of direct bodily shame? Something that's often shunned by society...

Oil Rig ( coming to a realization): Ahh, maybe it doesn't have to a business, what with the difficulty of managing. You've dug us this far Rob, think! I'm thinking something along the lines of... a worthwhile investment.

Rob ( hesitant yet exasperated): Of course! A thriving business that's degrading to primarily women. *sigh* Nonetheless, it is extremely pleasurable. Otherwise known as:

Together: Pornography!

Recap 2: U's Training Sequence ( prior to leaving the mansion; leading up to the current events)

Cinnamon: [ a brief live broadcast of the 'Man on Fire.' A vision that U only saw; the man whispering all three of their names whilst on top of a building. Pussy Mcgee, the reporter, calling it a hoax.. or an illusion. Only Cinnamon picked up on this vague discrepancy. U, fedup with the ignorance of Rob, decides to question him] "What about the tragic deaths of Trump & Romney? Do you not even find it remotely odd that I'm the only one who heard the whisper? Or that the two most notorious men in America were the targets of an unexpected death?

Rob: What're you talking about? Let's everybody just calm the bleep down. If the reporter said it was an-

Cinnamon: It isn't, alright? Screw it, I'm just gonna confront this thing alone. First thing's first though, a "quickie." I'm gonna leave with... let's just call it closure, so that you don't come chasing after me. [ U leaves the place, contemplating her next destination. A loner on the street, walking around the Pacific. Just then, an ad for a rehab-like center called 'Ultimate Supreme Taoist/Buddhist Temple,' provided just what she was looking for. She was now heading to Darking, Liberty City]