Inglorious Impostor Presents: The Astonisher's Return

Intermission

 [ scroll down to the big Shaq vid to get liit/if ur not interested in what I have to say. Keepin it 💯, it's all straight from the heart. The intro I mean. What little passion I put into the story is absolutely souless. Jk, don't worry]

Sup everyone, and Merry Late Litmas/Happy New Year's ( some hours after everyone got their gifts, as 12 yr old fanboys of COD WWII and Overwatch drool in awe and perpetuate the profitable model that is micro transactions & multiplayer only games from money hungry gaming companies)! It's been a minute, as they say, and as I try to socialize this book to make it culturally relevant and appealing to normies blinded and pressured by society's set standards to conform.  I'm back out of fear of my book being banned by Wattpad due to months of inactivity. Nah, quite the contrary actually, I was frantically pacing back and forth in the shower ( as I usually do), rubbing my hair and looking at all the hair strands that fell out of my hair into my hands. Don't worry, it's the stresses of life. You, most likely someone who has never experienced any domestic issues in his/her life, won't understand.

I felt this unique feeling, an obligation where I had to make another chapter ( anything for that matter) out of guilt because I knew I took a long hiatus; plus I felt that I owed you amazing groups of individuals, my diverse audience who, regardless of whether your new or worthwhile (  I'ma jus leave it at that) gave this online story a chance to thrive and stuck with me, and those long Paras, up until now. And for that, I can't even begin to express my thanks and gratitude to you all. I really appreciate all the reads.

It's crazy cuz I think I was like in middle school when I came up with Blacklist & Heists ( the original cliched title), which is also crazy bc I gave the impression that I sounded like an adult at the time. The writing, although juvenile and pre-pubescent ( well, not in my case at least cuz yah boih hit puberty early AF, fake ass ppl calling me out on it too) at one point, had an underlying ambition of telling a well crafted story heavily influenced by the highly praised film 'The Dark Knight' and games ( if you can even call it that; the medium, especially with games from studios like Naughty Dogs/Gawds as I call them, has for the most part, grown accustomed to story driven games) like GTA V & the Uncharted franchise ( big up!). I'll expose micro transactions, don't worry minority gamer audience.

This book has grown, both by itself and with me as I've grown, that I can at least say with confidence.  Inglorious Impostor started out out racy, in 1 connotation that the earlier chapters relied on stereotypical and often low class jokes ( which is a dying breed now that the phrase 'bruh, it's 2017' has been popularized). At one point while I was writing this story, I realized that it was kind of messed up because I'm also a minority ( in that I come from a different ethnic background other than your typical Caucasian American. Haha, I mean, what else?). But at the same time I meant for this book to be light-hearted, and jokingly approached at. After all, I did classify my book as a satire  because in a way, it exaggerates and exploits the life of 3 hesitant criminals with different outlooks on things.

Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that, with these previous story-related chapters, I've been trying to take a more mature, thoughtful, and even sentimental approach to storytelling to show you that I can appeal to a wider audience without the need of comedy. But I try to maintain a balance so that things don't get too serious, and so that people have more options as to how they want to be entertained. I'm merely a writer with a lackluster imagination, in terms of igniting ideas for potential plot points. That's why the chapters take so long; it takes time to come up with ideas to push the story forward. Even though I'm on this short ass Christmas/Winter break ( 1 week, like wtf bruh, I grinded my ass off during finals), I hope this chapter sort of gives you an idea as to why I might take or be gone so long. Well, that and the faults of the public education system ( i.e standardized testing, and thinking that regurgitating info demonstrates that we actually learned something) that conceive these horrendous institutions that you and I have might to attend to weekly; I'm in high school bruhv. Big Shaq: COMIN' UP NEXT! ( cringey Nicktoon ads, swear. and I don't even have cable!). Now, if I did have time on my hands, or if this was a full-time career, the situation that you and I face.. would be vastly different.