Letters To Louis // l.t.

February 27th, 2010 - letter 7

Dear Louis,

I guess I never will be good enough for you. I guess I never will be your girlfriend and let's be honest I may never be your friend.

I hate myself, for many reasons, but the main being that I just can't control myself. When I feel sad or angry or something like that then I just eat and eat and eat and then I hate myself more because I'm just getting fatter. But... this time was different. After I ate and ate and ate.... I threw it all up. I threw it all up and then I just cried. 

I really love you and I just want to be your friend. That's all.

Everything's falling apart. The bullies are getting worse, my parents aren't making enough money and are taking their anger out on me, and you still won't notice me. Why?

I really want to stop practicing with you, but I know this will be the only time I can spend with you so I won't.

I hate myself. My ugly, fat, stupid, worthless self. Nothing I ever do is good enough and nothing I ever do will be good enough. 

My tears are blurring my vision too much now, my stomach is growling and my throat burns from how much I've puked. I'm.. done.

Am I worth your time yet?

Am I worth you yet?

No of course not.

-Annabelle

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Jennifer Lawrence is playing Annabelle.