Make My Life Amazing

Chapter 1

Alex’s PoV

I walk down the street with Lou on my hip and Austin and Addison next to me. Paul trails slightly behind us. We are supposed to be shopping, but there are too many people following us and swarming us. People are always swarming us though. Everyone wants to know how the baby is doing, if I have cracked yet, if I am a wreck, if I am a bad parent, if I will give up. Too bad for them, I am none of those things. I am strong. I always tell myself that when all the pressure and the press start to get to me.

“Mommy,” Lou whispers quietly.

“Yeah?” I whisper back with a smile on my face.

“I wear mommy’s glasses?” He asks. I laugh and nod. Lou takes my glasses off and puts them on his little face. “I look like mommy,” Lou giggles.

“Yes you do, baby,” I laugh. I kiss his temple.

“Where do you guys want to go anyway?” Addison says.

“When do you think they will go away?” Austin asks, motioning to the people following us.

“When they get board of us,” I say.

“Not when you’re the sweetest mom ever,” Addison smirks at me.

“No, they want to see how long till I crash and burn, but the jokes on them. If I were going to crash and burn, it would have already happened,” I say. I know it’s a lie because I have to go through the court case still, and that has been really hard for me. I don’t know how I will react to any news.

Lou grabs my cheeks and stretches them out. “Squishy mommy,” Lou giggles. I laugh. I repeat his words. Lou laughs loudly.

I kiss Lou’s jaw line. “Cubby baby,” I tease.

“No, chubby mommy. No chubby baby,” Lou tells me.

I shake my head with a smile. “Can we go to get lunch?” Addison asks. “I am staving!” she singsongs.

“Paul, can we go eat?” Austin asks.

“Yeah, I’ll call Preston and have him pick us up,” Paul tells us.

Soon enough, we are climbing into the car. I strap Lou into his car seat. Lou sticks his thumb into his mouth and grabs his car seat stuffed animal. Yes, Lou has a car seat stuffed animal. He will not travel anywhere without it. Strange, but then again, he is related to me. I pull out my phone. There is nothing good on twitter. There never is. I put my phone away and sigh. I look up and see Austin and Addison being all cute and lovey. I sigh. I feel my heart break a little. I’m all alone. I don’t have time to date. I never have, and I doubt I ever will. I am responsible for Lou so I have to devote all my time to him, not that I mind. I just wish that I had someone to cuddle and hold like they do. I guess it just hurts to see them so happy. Don’t get me wrong, I am so happy that they have made it this far together, but sometimes it really makes me hurt.

I need to stop. I am just being selfish. I have the best son in the world. He is my world, my everything, and I don’t want another man coming into my life and messing it up. I don’t want or need that. I am perfectly happy with my baby, but sometimes I get lonely at night when I lie along in bed. Of course, Lou usually climbs into bed with me. I know that it isn’t good for him to be sleeping with me every night, but I like to cuddle and so does Lou. I like the company. I feel a bit better inside with it.

I know you’re probably like ‘why would you want to date if the last guy you ever dated was your best friend?’ Well, you see, I know that not every guy is bad because I’m not delusional, nor am I irrational. I try not to be like that because I know there is good in everyone, besides Collins. He is evil. He is the only exception to that phrase. I know that sounds silly, but it is true and you all know it so don’t give me shit about it!

Anyway…

Preston drops us off at some restaurant. I carry Lou inside. We sit down, and I am stuck listening to Austin and Addison act very lovingly. I hold my sigh back. Through the whole lunch, I am stuck pushing my food around while Lou yammers on about whatever it is he is talking about and Addison and Austin won’t shut up. I sigh and run a hand through my hair. We finish up wish lunch, and I am tempted to bolt out of the place.

“Where to now?” Addison asks.

“We have to go to something for Louis and Eleanor’s wedding,” Austin says.

“Then let’s go,” I say. We climb into the car, and Preston takes us to wherever this thing is being held. I don’t really know what is going on half the time with their wedding. I didn’t know with Zayn and Perrie’s wedding. I don’t expect to understand it because most of the time people are always telling us what to do so there is no need to know on my own. All I need to be ready for is the actual wedding and pretend to understand the rehearsals the night before the wedding. That is about it. The key is to smile the whole time. That’s about it. Okay, don’t take my advice because it is horrible advice.

We pull up to the building and head inside. I hand Lou off to his nanny, Claire. I hate to have to hand Lou off to her. I don’t like other people taking care of him. He’s my baby. Claire gives me a slight smile. I frown and walk away from her. I don’t really like her, and she knows that. I sit down at a table with Louis, Eleanor, Austin and Addison. I frown at the two couples. I drop my head a rub my scalp. This will be awful, no doubt about that.

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i updated! well, sorry that it sucks...uhm yeah...im tired....night. i will try to update again before christmas maybe.... 

sorry that it is a late update and that it is really short update but whatever... ill make them longer as i get into the story. i hope...