Chapter 32

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This is a quick update because...well two things. 

One: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO SangsterWangster HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ASHTON! (haha see what I did there:)) 

yeah, but happy birthday, girl. Have a lovely day!

tWo: I HIT 100 MOTHER FUCKING K ON THIS MOTHER FUCKING STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLL YEAH BITCHES! LIKE WHAT EVEN. I LITERALLY DIED WHEN I SAW IT TODAY! LIKEEEEEE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR YOUR SUPPORT AND DEDICATION AND NOT LEAVING MY STORY BECAUSE I KNOW IT SUCKS! I LOVE YOU ALLL SOOOOOOOOOO MUCH! (yeah no soml because we've been over this. I have over 700k on that story and I like choked and died when I hit that and this number as well because fuck)

Update on my math test (to those of you who really read my author's notes:)) : I did not in fact faily my math test. I actually got a 94% like what even? I am literally dying Algebra two is haaaaaaaaaaardddd.

Does someone want to tutor me?

Niall’s PoV

I sit on the hotel bed, anxious as ever. It’s been three hours since Alex walked out of the hotel room, and she hasn’t been back. I know this isn’t over. I know Alex will come back. I know that much, but I don’t know when she will, that’s why I am nervous. But as time progresses, I start to think she might not. I will see her again. She can’t just disappear out of my life, but, again, I don’t know when I will see her again. Alex is good at avoiding things, which leads me to believe that she has the ability to avoid me without being found. Plus, I bet everyone will be on Alex’s side. She has the ability to gather total pity from people without even trying. I know Louis and all the girls are on Alex’s side, no questions asked. Liam and Zayn will try to stay neutral, and I might have Harry to support me. And of course, Austin might punch me. I don’t even know why I am thinking of who is picking side in our fight. Honestly, it’s between Alex and me, and the only other person who will probably here about it is Austin because she’s probably in his room right now. Alex might talk to Eleanor, and if she does, everyone will hear about it. But if she doesn’t, no one will hear about it. Austin still might punch me.

This is all so fucked up. I want to go find Alex, but I need to prove a point. She can't stay away from me. I know that Alex adores me, as I adore her, but she is so stubborn some times. Plus, Alex thinks she messes things up, which isn’t true. She’s so hard on herself. She brings ‘everyone is their own worst critic’ to a whole new level. She tries to hide it, and maybe she doesn’t realize it, but I see it.

I rub my face. This is making me so restless. I know that things aren’t over because I know that Alex doesn’t want it to be over. I didn’t exactly realize that Alex was jealous. I was just really happy to see Maria, and Maria likes to cling to people, she gets attached easily. I didn’t realize that Alex was jealous until we got back to the hotel. She wasn’t saying anything to me, and I put two and two together. I don’t think it’s cute, I don’t understand people who think jealousy is cute. I felt bad that she felt that way, but I just started to get frustrated and then everything came crumbling down.

Someone help me because sometimes I don’t know when to stop talking. I try to be understanding, but when I get frustrated, I am mad. I kind of knew that I shouldn’t have invited Maria to come for a couple of nights. I just knew there would be issues, but Maria is a good friend of mine, and I would for her to be alone during this still difficult time for her. She has been getting better, but Maria is still a little messed up in the head. Maria has abandonment issues, and that is why she is so clingy. It’s hard to try and help her get over these issues if I can't be there for her as much as I want to. I feel bad that I can't be, but I have more important things to deal with right now like my job and whatever the hell I am supposed to do with my situation with Alex.

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