Make My Life Amazing

Chapter 8

Read carefully! Like if you get confused at one point just read carefully and continue reading!

Austin on the side...forgot to mention that...

Alex’s PoV

Partial gastrectomy. I actually hate those two words with a burning passion. I wish that they never existed. Now, if you were like me, you have no idea what those two words mean. If you do, then a round of applause for you because it’s kind of useless fact that you may never need. Partial gastrectomy is a surgery that removes part of your stomach, the bottom half to be correct. This is performed for Gastric Cancer, or stomach cancer. See why I hate those words? There are a ton of things that are affected by partial gastrectomy, like eating habits. If Lou survives, then his whole eating pattern will be thrown off. You have to eat small portions of food and have frequent meals. Also, some foods can make you sick or feel nauseous, and you have to have a certain diet so that you can have a proper nutrition. Yeah….I did a little research. This is freaking me out.

It is 4:02, which means Lou’s surgery has already begun. The partial gastrectomy (still hate the word and may be pronounced in your mind with some sass and sarcasm if you so desire) takes four to five hours. So his surgery will be over at eight at the earliest and nine at the latest. Then, Lou will be staying in the hospital for twelve days before Lou can go home. Then after two days Lou had to go back to the hospital for chemotherapy followed a day after by radiation therapy. This is rough. It’s rough for everyone. I feel like I am fighting against something I can't ever beat, which is true. I can’t beat the cancer myself, and I don’t know if Lou is strong enough to beat it. He is abnormally small for his age since he was born, not only premature, from a younger parent. Lou was supposed to be born in June, but the doctors predicted he would be born early a few months before he was born. Don’t ask me how they did it, but I can't imagine babies of young parents aren’t not born prematurely that often.

I am waiting in the waiting room. I won’t be moved. Austin has tried several times. He’s the only one I have seen in a while. Addison came earlier, but she had to go visit her grandma or something weird like that. I wasn’t totally listening. Everything has been going in one ear and out the other. My phone finally died, thankfully. Louis, Eleanor, Perrie, Zayn, Niall, Harry, Liam and even Danielle have all called me, but why won’t they show up here and be here for me. That’s all I want, and they keep freaking calling me. Do they even care that this has been worse than anything that I have ever experienced? Apparently not because I am all alone. I am completely by myself on this. I mean, Liam was here yesterday, but I haven’t seen him since then. I. Am. Alone. You know how scary this is though? To be waiting to see if your son dies or not. Not only that, but to be completely alone through all of this. Sure, I had Austin last night and some this morning and I had Liam yesterday, but they aren’t here now. I. Am. Alone. Alone Alexandra. Has a nice ring, doesn’t it?

All I want for Lou to have the life I didn’t. I want to keep spoiling him and showing him how it feels to be truly loved even when things get tough. I want to show him what forever means. I want to show him how amazing life can be if you just see the good, if you can over look the past. I don’t want anything but the best for Lou. But, can I still show him all these things? I don’t know if I will get the chance to do all those things because Gastric Cancer, ugh English please Alex? Okay, that was really weird…moving on.

I think I’m going crazy. I really think I am. I think that I am going crazy. I’m probably not, but I don’t really know what to think right now because everything that I have had planned for Lou and me has suddenly been altered because of what might happen. What might happen, that’s the worst. Not being sure of what will happen, but you know it can’t be good. It sucks. No it’s worse than sucking because a lot of things suck. Going through the drive-through and having the people mess up your order sucks. Losing in a game sucks. Having one of your pets go to the bathroom inside the house sucks. My situation? It’s a living hell. I have been living in hell for the past twenty-four hours. The best part is that it isn’t over.