Love on London

Chapter 45: Please don't take her.

Just to note to everyone at the End of this story, I will write 'The End'

Thanks for all the lovely support and encouragement. :)

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                                                  ~~ Jay's POV~~

I hate hospitals. I hate hospitals. I hate the air I breathe right now. I hate the pain; I hate the fear and the not knowing.

Tom’s dead to the world, forcing himself to stay with me for some unsaid reason. It felt like some horribly tragic love story where the girl dies after a life time of waiting for her Romeo. In his arms… she did.

It’s surreal. Truly… you never think it’ll be you. It was always there, it happened and I wasn’t oblivious to that… but until it happens to you… you have no idea of the immensity of the pain.

It’d been hours. Cold hours of the morning now. Mum and dad had come and gone. The rest of the band knew, Jayne had talked to me on the phone because Tom was too distraught to speak. He store at the white floor. If anything that was just as crushing… the memory of him placing her head in the pink snow, impure from her blood.

People came and went and it was as if we were in some bad dream, two men, not known to the rest of the world. Here we didn’t belong…

“Are you James McGuiness?” A woman said and my gaze snapped up the nurse with short blonde hair tied tightly in a ponytail.

“Yes,” I say. My voice was hoarse and weak. 

“I’m assuming you’re the father,” she said and looked to Tom who was staring tensely at the ground.

“No I’m her boyfriend,” I reply.

“Yes exactly,” she replied and her face went sympathetic. “We tried as hard as we could to save the baby… I’m sorry, but she’s in a bad state and the baby couldn’t be saved,” she continued. I frowned.

“Arria wasn’t pregnant though,” I say feeling my heart beat faster. My mind was racing to when, if ever, there had been a chance that…

“She was. I’m really sorry Jay,” the nurse said before turning to leave. I looked down to Tom who hadn’t moved.

“You guys were really drunk that one night,” he said quietly and rushed memories came back hitting like a brick wall after a high speed chase. I could have been a dad…

Later on in the early morning another nurse came to tell us that Arria was stable enough for us to see her. I never left her side. Holding her cold hand, pushing away the tears that came in her sleep. She was in a coma… the doctor said she’d be lucky to wake… my heart was beginning to break.

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“You need a break Jay,” Tom said coming to sit in the chair by the window. It was a rather bleak day, I’d forgotten which. Everything seemed to mush together within the hours I’d spent here.

“I fine,” I say closing my eyes and taking in a deep breath. Tom pushed a tea into my hands and forced me to drink it.

“You’re not,” he said and settled himself back down in his chair. “Go on then, be gone!” he said trying to lighten the mood by waving me off. “Go get her a book or something, I’ve heard that helps,” he continued before standing and pushed me out of the chair. I growled but left. I needed the time to breathe. I hated hospitals and Tom was right. I wasn’t fine.

It didn’t help that when I left the hospital there were a bunch of paparazzi and reporters. It seemed peace would not be found on the streets. I pulled my beanie further down over my ears and let my gaze stay on the concrete while they all talked useless words, just a dull murmur. When I retreated into the bookstore I was greeted by more useless words, more smiles that never broke the surface. I did however find a sanctuary here, amongst the written words.

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Tom’s POV

Arria seemed so still. Her chest rising and falling in a weak, yet steady rhythm. It was hard to understand that yesterday Jay was going to be a father, that she was actually pregnant. It was hard to understand a lot of things though… Why she had to die? Why like that? Was the world really that cruel… it seemed it was. Our first meeting was our last, our first kiss our last…

She used to laugh on the phone and say how she’d taught Pewi, her parrot, to say my lines. She always seemed so strong and directed to what she wanted. She said the wrong things at the right time often, more so she would break romantic moments with a cheeky line or a blunt comment. Her flaws where perfect, she used to say that ‘no one was perfect until you fell in love with them.’

A tear rolled down my check and I took hold of Arria’s hand. “I’m here. I’ll always be, for you and for Maggie. I promised, I promised…”

It was cold… cruel… why did things have to happen like this? So many things could be different with just a word, or a look, or a doing. If things were different…

Jay came back in and I slowly let go of Arria’s hand and went to move to the window seat.

“No,” Jay said and put a hand on my shoulder. “Stay… She needs you just as much as me,” he said before sitting himself at the window seat. Just moments later a nurse walked in.

“I’m sorry guys but you’re going to have to leave,” she said.

“Why?” I snap.

“Visiting time is over, and someone else needs to see her as well,” the woman said.

“It’s okay they can stay,” a man said behind her. He sounded American and when I realised who it was I turned to Jay. The nurse nodded and left. “How is she?” Shia asked coming to a stop at the end of her bed. He seemed genially upset, but I couldn’t help but be frustrated by him. What was he doing here!

“You would know if you’d come sooner,” I snap. He looked up with sad eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly and looked down at her.

“The doctor said she’ll be lucky to wake up from her coma,” Jay said sounding empty and vacant. I shook my head and gripped her hand tighter.

“No!” I say forcefully looking at her, deep in her sleep. “No she will wake up! She’s Arria, she’s a fighter,” I say and look up at them. “She’s a fighter,” I continue. I repeat it in my head.

You took Maggie from me, please, PLEASE, don’t take Arria as well…

As if someone had heard… and in some cruel jape… they pulled a cord… The dull line went in a cold long beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep and the room flooded with doctors who pushed us out. I hated the world in that moment.