Die for us

The more the merrier...

Jason’s POV –

“Honestly?” She says.

“Yeah, I do actually...” I laugh faintly. “We had great times.”

“We did.” I can hear the smile forming on her lips. “The field.”

Now I smile, “The beach.”

“Oh gosh,” She says, I know she’s probably rolling her eyes at the memories. “When you asked that guy to take a picture of us.”

“It turned out great though, didn’t it?”

“Yeah, it did.” She sighs. “I loved that picture.”

“I did too...” I clear my throat. “I loved a lot of things we did.”

“The skating rink.” She laughs, “You and Bliss were getting along great.”

“I know.” I bite the inside of my cheek after responding.

I kind of fucked it up, my relationship with Bliss I mean. I was so blunt with her about Bryn attempting suicide, I must have scarred her. I still don’t regret my choice of words but maybe I took it a little too far and she’s only a kid, but when my temper explodes I don’t think before I say.

“Just when everything was finally the way it should have been...” Bryn trails off, not wanting to continue.

She sighs and we fall silent. I sit up on the couch, resting against the cushions and stare down at my pants. Bryn remains silent and I get a feeling that she was going to consider hanging up.

“Listen...” I start off, releasing a deep breath and shutting my eyes. “I don’t want it to be like this between us.”

“What do you mean?” She responds nervously.

“Awkward...silent...before it was different. I didn’t mind the silence because at least you were still there but now it’s just...weird. It’s not the same.”

“I know, nothing is the same anymore.”

“But you seem to be pretty fine.” I shrug.

“Yeah, I’m ok I guess.” She laughs lightly, “I guess I needed my own time too.”

I bite my lip, over analyzing her statement. Maybe she went out and met someone too, I hope not. I can’t stand the thought of her moving on, even if it seems like I’m doing just that. I’m not the jealous type but if I see a guy holding Bryn the way I would, there’s going to be a problem.

“That’s good.” I nod my head, trying to sound casual. “I guess we both needed time.”

“Yeah...”

I love you.

That’s what I should say but I hold back and extract that sentence from my mind. It’s silent again and I hear Bryn clear her throat on the other end. I kind of wished I was in her room with her, just lying on her bed and talking about whatever came to mind.

None of our conversations focused on one topic, we always explored millions of topics. Not all of them made sense and half the time we don’t even remember how we started on the new topic but we always had great laughs and at least we were together.

I miss having her in my arms but I can’t do anything about that right now.

“I’ll...call you later.” I say.

“I’m going out for a bit so if I don’t answer whenever you call, I’ll call back when I can...”

“Alright, talk to you later.”