Die for us

Forgive and forget?

Jason’s POV –

“So I’ll see you tomorrow?” I say to Ariel, she was finally leaving after a full day together.

Right now I was being polite and walking her to her car, that’s not something I normally do with girls. Unless I actually had a good time with them, of course. Ariel turns around, walking backwards until her back bumps into her car door.

“Probably not.” She pouts, poking my nose. “I have dance class tomorrow.”

My eyebrows rise in sudden interest, “You dance?”

“Yeah, since I was five.” She smiles gingerly. “I’m there from six to eight, if you want to come down and pick me up...”

I smirk at her and she smiles at me, elbowing my stomach. Her eyes urge me to agree with the idea of picking her up and I actually do take the idea into consideration.

“Maybe.” I say with a sly smile.

“I’ll text you details later if you change your mind.”

I nod my head and she gives me a quick kiss on the lips. As she pulls away I grab her waist and pull her in to get another long kiss, her body stiffens from the shock but she quickly relaxes and grabs onto my shoulders. I tightly wrap my arms around her back and tilt my head, holding her close as we dig deeper into the kiss. Her hands clutch my shirt and I feel a smile spreading across her lips but she tries to focus on keeping our kiss intact.

The strange thing about this entire kiss is the fact that, I didn’t feel much. I can’t really explain it properly but basically, I didn’t get a spark like I usually do. Ariel’s a great girl and although she was upset with the fact that I ultimately decided not to tell her about Bryn, I still see myself developing a friendship with her.

Or not, that’s dangerous. I can’t be friends with someone like Ariel. We’d wind up having sex, without a doubt because with a body like that, I can’t keep my hands off.

And when I want something, I get it.

Besides, I chose to not tell her about my personal life for an obvious reason. I don’t know her enough to even tell her about Jazzy, hell I might not ever tell her because that’s connected to Bryn in a way too. In all honesty, I can’t trust anyone. I never could and never will. The one person I thought I could trust most deceived me and although she knows my most in depths secrets, that doesn’t mean I fully trust her.

I might never trust Bryn the way I used to, it’ll take a lot for her to regain my trust.

If I do consider not sticking with the idea of being friends with Ariel then I might as well cut off contacts with her. I’m not one to lead girls on, it makes them clingy sometimes and that shit annoys the hell out of me.

She pecks my lips once, pulls away and she hugs me tightly before walking around her car. Before opening the door she waves at me and I wave back before turning to walk back towards my house. Shoving my hands in my pocket, I let out a sigh and continue towards the house.

The day was coming to an end already and I think I know how I want to end it but should I do what my heart is telling me to do?

Ariel’s car pulls off and I sit down on the porch, bringing my hands together in front of my lips. I bite my finger, trying to vindicate an easy way to come to a finaldecision.

Maybe Ariel was right and maybe I should have told her about Bryn, but I don’t want her to know. There’s no easy way to explain my break up and there’s no easy way to get it through to someone why I still love Bryn so much.