he isnt that bad

the nights are the worst

its two am sunday morning rachel is in bed silently sobbing thinking about her dads jacob had woken up at one am bht was now soundly back asleep however sleep wasnt coming easy for rachel tonight.

she couldnt believe how so much could change in a year tjis time last year she had everything planned graduation then nyada then broadway she had had it planned since as long as she could remember. now she was a seventeen year old single mom with no parents. yet had she not had jacob she doubted she would have had a reason to get up out of bed after losing her dads but she had to her little boy needed her and thruth was she needed him.

rachel began to cry uncontrollably sobbing loudly then her bedroom doir opened her tears so full of tears she couldnt tell if it was sebastian or maggie.

" come here" sebastian's voice spoke softly in the dark she felt his arms around her holding her as she wept.

she cried for what felt like hours she was surprised jacob didnt wake up because of her loud sobs.

finally as her tears subsided she felt embarrassed about sebastian seeing her in such a state.

" you want a cup of tea" he asked

" yeah" rachel said she felt the bed move as he got up to go make it as he left the room she put the lamp on her night stsnd on and grabbed a tissue to dry her soaked face thrnnshe caught sight of hererlf in her mirtor her face all puffy she turned the lamp off.

a few minutes later sebastian arrived back with a cup of tea for her he slowly made his way around the bed and placed it on her nightstand before seating on the side of her bed.

" sorry if i woke you up" rachel said feeling bad about it

" i was awake anyway" sebastian said

" really why" rachel asked

" just thinking" sebastian said

" about" rachel said wanting to focus on anything other than her dads as it was too painful

" just thinking about different things" sebastian said

" dont you think its weird we are both awake yet jacob for once is sleeping " rachel asked

" yeah i had noticed that" sebastian said

" i nope i didnt wake your mom up" rachel said

" if she had heard she would have been thtough here so dont worry about it" sebastian said

" you seem to get on with noah " rachel said

" noah" sebastian asked

" puck " rachel said

" oh yeah he is a nice guy little rough around the edges but i think he is better for it" sebastian said

" yeah i know what you mean" rachel asked before taking a sip of her tea

" everyone was making an effort earlier to get along" sebastian said

" yeah they were" rachel said

" because they care about you" sebastian said

" yeah" rachel said feeling emotional

" you have alot of people who care about you and love you your not alone never think that you are" sebastian said

" friends are the family you make for yourself i believe is the saying" rachel said

" yeah and its true" sebastian said

"  just wish i could tell them i love one last time" rachel said breaking down

" they knew how much you loved them rachel i know how close you were to them" sebastian said taking hold of her hand.

they remained silent after that rachel was lost in her thoughts she started to feel tired she was emotionally exhausted.

" dont take this the wrong way  but do you want me to stay i will sit here until your asleep then go to my room or i could lay ontop of the covers if you didnt want to be alone" sebastian said

" would you" rachel said

" which one" sebastian asked

" the second " rachel said the thruth was she didnt want to be alone not now she didnt like been in a crowd  ut completely by herself was when her grief hit her the hardest.

sebastian stood up taking off his dressing gown and got on top of the covers placing his robe over himself rachel had one last mouthful of tea by laying down and  finally sleep tuck over.