Submitted by: @dreamcatcher-belief
Reviewed by: thief_queen
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Original work.
Name: Jake <middle name tba> Alipoli
Plot: It's basically a world where about .01 of the people are born with powers- some are visible at birth(ex. wings), some are found out later in life(ex. seeing the future)
Ooh I'm intrigued.Age: 15
Race: white
Background: Jake was born with the power of making a protective shell around himself. He noticed it when he got in a fight at 7 years old with his school friend. Angry, his friend threw something at him, and he freaked out, closing his eyes, only to realize the rock had bounced off. He wasn't sure what had happened, but whatever had protected him had disappeared in the matter of a second or two. He told his parents, but they doubted him, despite his attempts to prove it. He grew up, being able to protect himself for almost a second. His parents finally believed him, and when he was 15, he took a flight to live near a high school meant just for people like him- with powers.
Ooo, nice.Talents/Skills: making a 1-minute meal in 58 seconds, he's good with technology and has fast hands.
Bruh me too.Sexuality: Straight
Significant other: n/a
Distinguishing features: has a small birthmark on his left hand's palm.
Habits: Listening to music, singing, cooking.
Cute!Self confidence level: like 6.5/10?
50/50 emotion logic
That's pretty good :)A mix of both introvert/extrovert, depends on the event.
So he's an ambivert!Strengths: He's good with puzzles and, as mentioned, technology.
Weaknesses: He has asthma, and usually trips over his words if he talks too fast.
ME TOO.Extra Notes: he had a pet snake that he gave to his sister, Rose, when he left for the high school.
Constructive Criticism: I can't really give any constructive criticism because I don't really know what your plot is. But maybe that's the issue? Your plot isn't really developed... like, there's no point where there's a climax. Basically, there's no conflict so far.
Intrigue: 75% due to confusion with how character relates to plot
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OC Reviews [CLOSED]
DiversosAn OC review book for those who want feedback on their characters. I give constructive criticism and I try to give non-biased feedback. Started: July 2017 Completed: October 2017 Highest Ranking: #702 in Random