Darker Than Love | ꪜ

Darker Than Love | 41

Michelle's POV

Nothing felt more painful than sitting on a chair in front of a mirror, glaring at your reflection, a reflection you once considered strong, brave, adventurous, loving. But then one day, you sit down in that chair and you no longer see those things, instead; you see someone you've tried countless times to bury deep.

Someone you were ashamed of, someone who made you weak, gullible, naive. Someone who was the worse part of you. And as you sit there staring back at that someone you wanted nothing more than to climb into that mirror and strangle them.

Strangle the weakest parts of you because with it came pain; pain you couldn't handle. As I sat there, my hands slowly trailing down the dark bags under my eyes I wanted nothing more than to extend my hand into that mirror and strangle the broken girl staring back at me.

I was at square one, all over again. All the progress that I had over the past few months was now drained down the drain. Is this what I get for opening my heart up to someone that isn't meant for me? Someone- a certain type of person who I was always warned was bad for me?

Is this what I get for being stubborn? If it is then I deserve it because I never learn my lesson, not with Kaleb, Deborah and now Mason.

Mason, I haven't seen Mason in weeks and at this point, I no longer cared if he was okay. I don't care why he did it, why he said what he said because if he truly knew me he knows that I could have handled whatever it was that was going on.

But instead, he broke me, shattered what was left of my heart and I don't know how soon I could forgive him. At first, I didn't leave my room, I couldn't. I stayed in bed, wallowing in my own despair under my comforter. Until my parents and literally everyone in my life had enough.

Tristan, Sebastian and Sasha forced me out of bed, it took some convincing and a lot of shed tears and angry outbursts but in the end, they convinced me to come back to school, especially since exams are around the corner.

Right now it was about five am which meant I had ample time before I have to get ready for school. So I decided to do something I never thought I'd do. I decided to dye my hair because what's growth if a girl doesn't change her appearance?

I'm kidding, of course, it's not mandatory in growth but I'm tired of looking at my blonde hair, it makes me feel weak.

I sauntered into the bathroom and retrieved my pair of scissors from the cabinet along with a box of hair dye. It was my mom's hair dye but I took it from her room a few months ago to dye my hair but I backed out last minute. Now I was finally going to do it.

I opened the box and peered down at it, a heavy sigh escaping my lips as I brought the bottle up to my eyes, "new hair, new me."

•••

"Good morning sweetheart, how are you f-" my mother paused as her eyes zoned in on my hair and she parted her lips in shock, her hands slapping over her mouth, "is that my hair dye?" She asked first and I shrugged my shoulders nonchalantly as I sauntered towards Tristan who was sat at the table, peering up at me, equally as shocked as my mother.

"Yeah, I thought I'd try something new, do you guys like it?" I asked. Tristan's lips tugged upwards into a smile, "if it makes you happy then I like it," he said. I ruffled his hair playfully and lowered myself down beside him, returning a smile to him, "thanks, Trist."