The Downfall of Zhan Zheng Xi

Chapter Forty Seven - Group Therapy

Jian Yi sat at his table on the floor, notebooks, textbooks, paper, sticky notes, small coloured sticky tabs littered his books and notes. Why did they have to lump so much homework on students? Jian Yi sighed tiredly, he had been studying for three hours now, he was ready to stop for evening. Maybe he could game or read some manhua before he crashed out for the night. Putting his pencil down, he gathered all of his shit up and stuffed them in his school bag for tomorrow.

Standing up he stretched all of the kinks out of his back and padded over to the kitchen for a cup of tea. His mother had long since retired to bed, and the house was quiet and dark. Looking at the clock he realised that it was already 11.30pm, fuck when was he supposed to have time to just hang out and have fun, never apparently. Between his cram school and homework from school, his evenings recently had predominantly consisted of him staying up late doing reams and reams of work then falling into bed. Jian Yi hoped with all of his heart that his hard work paid off, that he would be with Zhan Xi at the same University.

Ji had not accepted, at all, that they may actually get separated. He knew he wasn't going to be able to cling to Zhan Zheng Xi forever, they would eventually get different jobs and may even be transferred to different parts of the country, or even be moved overseas! Jian Yi shuddered at the thought. Walking back to his room, he lay down on the bed and pulled the sheets up to his shoulders, the lights clicked off then Ji grabbed his phone and left it on the bed near his head (sometimes Xixi messaged him late at night if he was awake and bored.)

His phone had been silent all night so Xi either was working hard like him, he had fallen asleep early and not finished his homework or he was doing something with his family. Was it wrong to miss someone so much that your heart literally hurt? Lately he felt like he was being even more clinging than normally, he was finding it harder and harder to wave Zhan Xi off and go home without him. He felt foolish for lying there and missing someone who he saw everyday. Stupid! Sometimes he just wanted to fall asleep next to Xi's warm body, lying with their feet touching, his gently breathing....... Was he just monopolising Zhan Xi especially when they had to concentrate on their exams?

Jian Yi jumped when his phone chimed.

Zhan Xixi: Hey I cant sleep, are you awake?

JIAN YI: Xixi!

Zhan Xixi: I thought maybe you were snoozing by now.

JIAN YI: Just finished all my homework, brutal.

Zhan Xixi: Are you tired? I can go

JIAN YI: Nooooo! I'm not tired, I was just thinking about you.

Zhan Xixi: Really?

JIAN YI: Yes.

Zhan Xixi: What thoughts were going through your head Jian Yi?

JIAN YI: I was missing you and I was imagining you lying beside me.

Zhan Xixi: Fuck.

JIAN YI: Listening to your soft breaths next to me is soothing.

Zhan Xixi: You do this on purpose.

JIAN YI: ????

Zhan Xixi: You always say things that either make me want to hug you tight and never let go or push you down and fuck your brains out.

JIAN YI: So romantic.

Zhan Xixi: Just saying it like it is.

Mo Guan: Umm Zhan Xi you're chatting in the group chat message.

HE TIAN: Ssssh Mo you should have just kept quiet!

Mo Guan: What were you hoping to read?! I'm sick of my fucking phone chiming with all of this lovey dovey shit.