I'll find you

30. That night

No POV

"Ali? Who is he?" Emily asked one more time after the blonde kept quiet, not moving at all.

She didn't know what to do or what to say.
Alison wanted to tell Emily about who this guy was, but she was scared of her reaction.
After all this time, Alison still hadn't forgave herself for it.
She didn't think she ever would.

"I-I..." Was all she could manage to say.
To be honest, Emily was starting to feel anxious and was losing her patience.

"Alison!" The brunette raised her voice a little this time, enough to make other people in the Cafe to look at them and enough to make Ali shake even more.

"Emily..." Melina's voice was heard as a whisper.
Emily looked at her to receive a look from her friend. Mel gestured towards Alison's hands that were shaking, while the blonde looked down with a tear rolling down her face.
This made the brunette immediately regret about raising her voice like that.

"Talk to me... please." Emily's voice was gentle now, but it was still a desperate sound. She needed to know what had happend and who this person was.
And why it was affecting Ali this bad.

"N-Not here." A broken sound escaped the blonde's lips as she kept looking at everything except Emily's eyes.
Avoiding the only thing that could make her break in a second.
The guilt she felt was ripping her apart, she wanted to just disappear in this moment, be invisible to Emily's eyes which were filled with fear, anxiety but also a little of anger.
Anger because she was hating the fact that her girlfriend was hidding something like this, something that looked so important and serious.

Emily could see how much this was affecting Ali, how much the girl looked afraid herself and didn't want to talk about whatever this was.

Without a word she stood up, putting her hand over Alison's which was on the table.
By feeling the unmistakable warmth, Alison's blue eyes met Emily's brown ones.

Emily gestured to the blonde to stand up and to follow her.
Melina looked at Emily and without words, Mel knew she should give them some time in private, so she nodded and the other two girls left the Rose and went to their apartment.

The way was silent and when they sitted finally on the couch next to eachother, Alison hold Emily's hand in hers on her lap. She hadn't let go of it sunce they had left the Rose.

Holding it back, Emily squeezed it a little encouraging Ali to speak.

"Aaron Parker... was a 19 year old boy." A whisper came out of the blonde's mouth. So low that Emily had to come a little closer to understand completely.

"A boy with apparently no family or friends... A boy that had been homeless for 5 months until that night... A boy that-that..." Tears filled her blue eyes, her heart was aching at the memories of that night. That horrible night that marked her forever.

Emily had no idea what would come out of her girlfriend's mouth, saying that she was scared wasn't enough to describe it.

"A boy...that I killed."

Emily's face went pale, completely shocked to what Alison had just confessed.

Killed? Emily thought to herself.
Alison had killed someone?

The blonde couldn't help the sobbs escaping her throat.
Emily was still motionless, trying to process what she had heard.

Alison hold the sobs and spoke again,

"I... I had a fight with Ethan 2 years ago. I left the house around midnight and drove away from him... I was furious, and I wasn't completely focused on the road, the fact that it was dark didn't help. I was driving through this alley and than out of nowhere... this body appeared right infront of my car and-" Before she finished the sentence, the crack of her voice was heard and she started crying again.