Star Crossed

Chapter Fifty Two- Not all monsters are bad

Sighing I dodged through the chattering friends and slow dancing couples in the direction of the bathroom, some salvation. I was not jealous! 
I pushed open the heavy wooden door and snook myself inside closing the door behind me and leaning my back against it closing my eyes glad to be away from everyone even if only for a moment. 
"Aww it must be hard watching Tom actually spend time with someone worthy of him." a snide voice echoed around the tiled walls causing him to grit my teeth, not her not now. 
I chose to ignore her and opening my eyes I walked straight towards one of the stalls only to have a hand slam the door shut before me, I took a large breath to steady my frustration as I turned my eyes upon her. There she stood her tall frame towering over me, her red lip and dark smokey eyes gleaming as she smirked down at me.
"What is it that you want Celia? If you are having such a wonderful time with Riddle why don't you rush out to rejoin him." I snapped through gritted teeth.  
"Tom has gone to get us some drinks while I came to freshen up actually don't worry I will be re-joining him." 
"Lovely." I replied putting on my best fake smile. "Now would you be so kind as to remove your hand from the door I would like to use this bathroom." 
Celia scoffed and dramatically flung her hand away from the door causing it to swing backwards and bang against the tiled wall the sound  echoing around the bathroom. 
Pretending she had already left I made to walk into the cubical for the second time, this time however Celia did not stop me but called after me. 
"You know he hates you don't you? He moans about you all of the time that pathetic little Gryffindor lost in the daydream of becoming a heroin he merely plays with you like a toy and there is only you too stupid to see it." 
I slammed the cubicle door shut in her face with force my hands shaking I bit my lip to stop the tears that were welling in my eyes from falling as I heard Celia laugh before hearing the sound of the bathroom door clicking shut as she left. 
I kicked the cubicle wall and slumped down onto the seat of the toilet my body still shaking as her words rang within my head... she was probably lying... she was probably lying... 
but my mind kept returning to his Slytherin lap dogs who followed him around and addressed me so rudely so disrespectfully... if they thought me a genuine friend of Tom's would they treat me with such amusement? Unable to handle the anger anymore my recklessness getting the better of me I threw open the bathroom door and stormed from the bathroom walking back out into the crowded hall I scanned it feverishly before I spotted him stood nonchalantly beside Rosier and Malfoy at the drinks table talking casually to the both of them and so I made my beeline for them almost pushing others out of the way not really caring for politeness as I heard them huff and grunt. 
As I reached them they turned to look at me all three of them the same stupid smirk on their faces I felt my breathing hasten... no Grisha stop... no I told myself over and over in my head but I couldn't control it I couldn't speak and so my hand drifted towards one of the crystal goblets on the nearby table. 
"What is it Grisha?" Tom drawled rolling his eyes towards Malfoy at the side of him. His obnoxious behaviour confirming in my mind what Celia had said I felt my hand involuntarily lift the goblet full of punch and throw it all over Tom's face and chest. 
Rosier and Malfoy stood back their mouth agog as they stared at their now dripping sweet smelling leader who stood staring at me eyes wide frozen in shock. 
Not waiting for a response I dropped the goblet causing it to shatter at my feet as people began to turn around and take notice of what was happening feeling my eyes fill again with tears I ran from the Hall pushing people forcibly out of my way before I eventually passed the threshold and ran out into the courtyard my breathing heavy I screamed into the night sky as the heavy rainfall fell upon me beginning to drench me through and yet I couldn't even feel the cold as my skin burned with anger. 
Suddenly a strong hand grabbed my shoulder and swung me around to face them. 
"What in Merlin's name is wrong with you Grisha?" he spat he looked furious and yet at the same time there was something else in his eyes. 
"Oh please Tom why don't you just go and play with Celia if she is so worthy of you, you cunning, ambitious Slytherins' together." I hissed throwing my hands into the air knocking Tom's hand away. 
"Celia?" Tom scoffed. "This is about Celia? You are jealous and yet you came with Lazarus." his voice held a bitterness I had not heard before. 
"Me! Jealous of her! Tom we have talked about this I would never be jealous of such an empty headed shallow excuse of a human being. Are you jealous?" I mocked shifting my weight to one side. 
"Me jealous Merlin Grisha. What makes you  think that you can humiliate me that way?" His anger was gleaming in his eyes once more as the bore into me. 
"Oh don't pretend Riddle." I laughed darkly as I stamped my golden heels on the wet stone floor. 
"I am not afraid of an argument with you Grisha." his eyes seemed to darken as they pieced me.
"Yes you are! Come on! Get emotional. Get angry. Spit your venom. Be unrelenting and cruel with your words just like you tell them go on tell me. TELL ME!" I yelled advancing upon him again but Tom grabbed my wrist as I come closer and held him still as he stared down at me. 
"Let go of me. Let go of me or so help me Merl-" 
"Grisha!" Tom hissed firmly causing me to stare up at him breathing hard. 
"You think I'm pathetic? Weak?" I snapped putting my hands upon my hips. "You make me look a fool to all of them." I gestured to the hall and the people within it. "Lazarus? Wiglaf? Are they also pawns in your little game." 
Tom's face turned cold. 
"I don't waste my time with people I think are pathetic and weak Grisha. Yet clearly you would prefer to believe the words of an airhead like Celia than that of mine?" 
"You are a monster!" I spat my anger spilling forward  bubbling inside of me causing me to lose my ability to listen clearly. 

"You don't know who I am!" Tom yelled suddenly losing his composure the sudden change startled me. 
"Yes I do! I know you better than you know yourself!" We both stood in silence the rain completely soaking us through dripping from our hair and skin breathing hard. 
"Don't you get scared that I will hurt you when I get angry?" Tom whispered stepping closer to me. 
"No," I replied instantly.
"Why I am a monster," he hissed. 

"Because not all monsters are bad." I replied.

"You have no idea who I am or what I am capable of." He sneered. 

"And yet you haven't hurt me yet Riddle." I whispered.

The world seemed to slow down as the only sounds we could hear was the pattering of the rain and the soft distant music of the dance without thinking without knowing what possessed me I slipped my hand into own of Riddles and raised it up into position placing my other arm around his neck to my utter surprise Tom did not protest but hesitated as he slipped his free hand around my back as we began to move to the music my whole body felt as if it was under attack from pins and needles, my skin burning under his touch my wind whirling as I took in his presence close to mine the familiar smell of his cologne we had never been this close and it was in this moment that perhaps I realised that this was different... we were not brother and sister but then what were we? Tom moved us elegantly around the courtyard before twisting my arm and twirling me around feeling the cold rain fall upon my face as he leaned me backwards his face hanging over my own as time stood still his face did not display happiness but it did not display sadness either it displayed... fear as he pulled me back upright and let go of me leaving me stood before him.  

"Look Grisha... stop." he hissed.
"Stop what?" I breathed. 
"This." He sighed. "Stop trying to get into my head you could never handle it." He snarled.
"I won't let you in."
"Why? Why not?" I groaned feeling myself get frustrated again.
"To protect you." he shouted at me in exasperation.
"Protect me? From what your feelings?"
"I've already told you Grisha I don't have feelings." 
"I think you're lying Riddle and not just to me to yourself. I don't want to be protected Tom."
"You don't have a choice." he replied before turning around and walking away from me.

"Why do you always walk away?" I called after him but he did not turn around, the tears couldn't hold themselves any longer and they fell down my cheeks I fell down sitting upon the wet cold floor my heart aching and I couldn't even fully understand why or what had even happened.